Blitz spirit will see us through says man panic buying sanitary towels and Quinoa
The UK's Health Secretary, Matt Hancock, has likened the nation's handling of the Coronavirus pandemic to the "Blitz spirit" which saw plucky Brits through...
I’m definitely not addicted to my smartphone, says person reading this on her smartphone
A Rochdale woman has told her friends that she's definitely not addicted to her smartphone, whilst reading a news story about people being addicted...
Posh twit in gilet loses both arms to frostbite
Henry Charles Chomlomoly has been telling us how he's lost both his arms whilst out sledging.
Harry told us, "Cripes, got up this morning and...
Getting drunk and falling over is the real meaning of Christmas, says everyone
Heavy drinking from breakfast till unconsciousness has won the top spot in a national survey to discover what makes Christmas so special for the...
I don’t shave cos I’m a Gillette John, claims Heil Vis clad Neon Nazi
Shaving that's a little too aggressive, or done with dull blades, can produce irritants which can form a rash right round your Parliament area. ...
Scientists confirm autocorrect was inverted by a cult
A group of scientists have today confirmed what we have all long believed, that autocorrect was inverted by a cult.
Professor Gerald Wiley spoke to...
Grammar police call for tougher sentences
Grammar police call for tougher sentences Campaigners are calling for grammar errors to be punished with tougher sentences - especially for repeat offenders. "There...
Northerner brings Kraft Slices to cheese and wine party in Surrey
A disgraced Northerner has been barred from ever returning to the South, after he humiliated his sister at a bourgeoisie Cheese & Wine evening...
Dry January downgraded to reduced drinking January
A Rochdale man has told us how he has revised plans to do dry January and will now be doing reduced drinking January instead.
Bill...
Complete sadist buys 2 year old nephew a keyboard for Christmas
A man from Rochdale has bought his nephew the gift of music for Christmas.
Stan Still told us, "I've played in bands since I was...
Middle aged man who bought passata just one small step from red skinny jeans...
Rochdale man Stan Still is just a short step away from buying skinny red jeans according to his girlfriend.
Alga Rithem, Stan's partner for the...
Some like it…NOT! Monroe fan’s £8k new look more like man’s best friend than...
French waiter Cyril Roux is a HUGE Marilyn Monroe fan.
'I guess you could say I'm addicted to injections,' mumbles Cyril Roux, a 32-year-old waiter...
Vegans to save UK billion man hours in tedious conversations by wearing hats saying...
There is widespread jubilation amongst business leaders around the UK after bold plans to save a billion working man hours a week have been announced by the Institute of Vegans.
Asian family enjoying post night out curry accused of ‘Cultural Appropriation’
A British-Asian family came under intense fire today, after being accused of extreme 'cultural appropriation' from White groups, for enjoying a post pub curry...
