Small bald man held for questioning over fairground disappearance of six children
Police have arrested a small bald wizard in connection with the unsolved disappearance of six children between the ages of 8 and 15 at...
Leave campaigner forced to abandon argument after forgetting what Brexit means
Panic today as vocal anti-EU campaigner, Dennis Pigwater, forgot a crucial piece of his argument during an online debate.
Dennis, 58, from Rochdale, was engaged...
Trump claims their is good people on both sides of grammar nazi debate
President Trump has weighed into the grammer nazi debate by claiming their is good people on both sides.
Discussions and arguments about correct use of...
Mary forced to give birth on stable floor after health insurance refuses to cover...
A woman that claims she's about to give birth to the son of God has told the Herald, about how she is being forced...
Saudi Arabia’s handling of Khashoggi killing worst cover up ever, says completely bald man
A completely bald man who is convinced everybody thinks he has a full head of hair has criticised Saudi Arabia's handling of the killing...
The United States to allow Guns to be purchased from Vending Machines
United States, Washington DC - A new bill has been passed in the United States, to allow firearms to be sold from Vending Machines....
Chilcot stuns world with news that Pope is catholic
Sir John Chilcot has stunned the world by stating again that the Pope is catholic and so it seems is Britain's greatest wartime leader...
Thoughts and prayers shortages in US reaching crisis point
Shortages of thoughts and prayers for the victims of gun violence is said to be reaching crisis point this morning with many dead people...
Westboro Baptist Churchgoers saddened by news that God actually hates FAQ’s
Congregation of famously homophobic church disheartened to learn that The Almighty is 'proper hacked off with being asked the same dumb shit over and...
We’re doing just fine says President of country whose hobbies include shooting children at...
The so-called President of a country that lists shooting children at school amongst its most popular hobbies has told the UK Prime Minster to...
Harvey Weinstein one step closer to presidency after filing for bankruptcy
The New York studio co-founded by disgraced film producer Harvey Weinstein is to file for bankruptcy, in a move sure to put him a...
Donald Trump: DNA test finds ‘strong evidence’ of human DNA
US President Donald Trump has revealed that a DNA test shows "strong evidence" that he is distantly related to human beings.
He took the test...
Charlie Brooker commits suicide whilst writing his 2016 Wipe
The much loved satirist repeatedly smashed his face into his own coffee table whilst reading through a draft of his hugely anticipated show.
In the...
UN tells Goodwill Ambassador to fuck off
After a record low of zero days in the job, the new UN Ambassador, whose job it would've been to generally spread love and...
Putin joins America in suffering from Trumpgret
Relations between the US and the Russian Federation have deteriorated since Trump became president, says Vladimir Putin.
"Listen, sweetie dahling, I thought rigging the elections...
Trump announces plan for sea wall to keep out foreign storms
Donald Trump has unveiled his latest scheme to “make America great again” - a huge wall along the entire coast to keep out hurricanes,...
