Hampstead Heath Glory Holes to close in respect for George Michael
Regular visitors to Hampsted Heath have been informed all glory holes will be closed from tomorrow as a mark of respect to George Michael.
A...
“One walk a day more than enough” say The Proclaimers
Following Prime Minister Boris Johnson's announcement that the UK is now in a state of national emergency and that citizens are only permitted to...
Fatboy runs away from the Ball
The worlds biggest celebrity couple, Ball and Slim, have sadly announced they are to divorce after 18 years of party-hard marriage.
ITV to rival Gogglebox with show about idiots watching morons watching television
Channel 4 have been ratings kings for the last few years with their flagship show, Gogglebox.
In the surprise smash idiots get to watch...
Burnley residents “Delighted” by the introduction of BBC2 in the area
BBC2 finally came to Burnley yesterday.
The TV channel, which first aired to the british public in 1967, finally made its first transmition to...
Band at every live gig is having loads more fun than audience
According to experts who have been to gigs every band in the world is definitely having more fun than the audience.
"Standing ankle deep in...
Bert Outs Himself as Straight After “Living a Lie”
Actor and former Sesame Streeter Bert has broken one of the major taboos that surround acting by revealing that he is not gay.
Bert had...
Hollywood shocked as no Fast & Furious movie released this week after star’s arrest
Hollywood bigwigs and film goers alike were left reeling by the news that the seemingly endless Fast and Furious franchise does not have a...
Google crashes as hipsters race to be “lifelong influenced” by Fats Domino
The death of the latest life-long influence of people too painfully cool for words, Fats Domino, has caused a Google Crash despite everyone thinking...
Clive Dunn in Nazi uniform outrage
Dad's Army Star Clive Dunn has apologised after being pictured wearing a Nazi uniform.
The Sun on Sunday published pictures of the celebrity actor and...
Katie Hopkins reluctantly buys conventional toilet after running out of platforms to shit from.
Katie Hopkins has been spotted in the bathroom section of Homebase today, after being forced to find a conventional way to dispose of her...
Peter Pan of Pop Peeves Proud Populace
Cliff Richards recently learned that South Yorkshire Police will not be pursuing historic sexual abuse claims against him, but he hasn't escaped the wrath...
James Bond producers buzzing about Putin’s Cold War reboot
The producers of the James Bond movie franchise are said to be absolutely over the moon about Vladimir Putin's recent decision to reboot the Cold War.
Yes Prime Minister explains the Trident Vote
Sir Humphrey: With Trident we could obliterate the whole of Eastern Europe. Jim Hacker: I don't want to obliterate the whole of Eastern Europe.
Sir Humphrey:...
Blockbuster Video returns to Rochdale high street in post EU Britain
There were scenes of creaky jubilation on Rochdale's decaying high street as crowds celebrated the return of retail giant Blockbuster.
Rochdale's elderly population had turned...
A-ha Star In Blaze Nightmare
A source close to 80’s Norwegian heartthrob Morten Harket, of synthpop sensations A-ha, has confirmed that the housewives’ favourite was rushed to hospital last...
