Game of Thrones

Cabinet to watch Game of Thrones to pick up tips on killing each other

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Theresa May has reportedly ordered her cabinet, and junior ministers, to watch Game of Thrones in order to get better at killing one another. This...
Johnny Love Island

Love Island Johnny reveals ‘I have the clap’ as bosses rebrand hit show ‘Syphilis...

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Love island viewers were last night in shock after it was revealed the island is to be transformed into a syphilis colony. The revelations came...
Jack Whitehall

Jack Whitehall cast in lead role in Idris Elba biopic

Over the weekend the actor and "comedian" Jack Whitehall took to social media to address rumours that he might play Idris Elba in the...

Gove to juggle environment portfolio with rent boy role in Midnight Cowboy sequel

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Michael Gove will juggle his new appointment as environment minister with a starring role in the long awaited sequel to 60s cult classic movie,...

Kate Middleton and Meghan Markle should settle rift with bikini jelly wrestling demand Daily...

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Daily Express readers have today demanded that Meghan Markle and Kate Middleton settle their differences with a bout of bikini jelly wrestling. Express reader, Ian...

Paul Hollywood found dead after ‘eating himself’

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Master baker, Paul Hollywood's human remains were found a few hours ago in a Premier Inn in Clitheroe. "All that was left was his right...

Florence and Dougal quit UK over Brexit fears

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In a shock move, Magic Roundabout stars Florence and Dougal have announced they are quitting the UK to move back to their native France...

Idris Elba to play Duke of Wellington

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In what has been seen as an homage to Brexit, Idris Elba is to take on the role of The Duke of Wellington in...

Stevie Wonder just chooses to be blind, says Kanye West

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Batshit crazy US rapper Kanye West has said that the Stevie Wonder’s blindness may be a “choice.”

Fears for safety of Strictly 2016 producers as AdB meets JCC

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Strictly Come Dancing returned to our screens this evening in a whirlwind of glitz and glitter. Amongst the celebrities dancing for our pleasure over...

Greta Thunberg releases Scandinavian Death Metal album.

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The music world has been surprised by the release of an album by Greta Thunberg and the Prophets of Doom, a new death metal...

Twitter explodes after banning racist for racism after warning him not to be racist...

The social media platform Twitter is going bonkers today after permanently banning a user for inciting an abusive racist attack on a fellow Twitter...

Harry Potter thinks Corbo is “Absolutely Wizard!”

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Former Auror and famed 'boy who lived' Harry Potter has revolted against JK Rowling, who is his creator, by supporting Jeremy Corbyn only days...
Darth Vader

Ken Loach to direct next Star Wars film ‘Empire on Strike’ as gritty Northern...

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Star Wars fans have been shocked by Disney's announcement that Star Wars episode IX will be directed by Ken Loach, who plans to pivot...

‘Darkest Hour’ movie just two hours of Churchill shagging

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Viewers have reacted with shock after the new Winston Churchill biopic, Darkest Hour, depicted Britain's former wartime Prime Minister having sex for two hours...
Golden eagle

Birds of Prey sue rock band the Eagles

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In a landmark case the popular American rock band The Eagles are being sued by a flock of birds for use of the band's...

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