Love Island Johnny reveals ‘I have the clap’ as bosses rebrand hit show ‘Syphilis...
Love island viewers were last night in shock after it was revealed the island is to be transformed into a syphilis colony.
The revelations came...
Cockroaches latest to quit I’m a celebrity, after refusing to touch Katie Hopkins.
Following on from yesterday's shock departure of the venomous snakes, an intrusion of cockroaches have also terminated their contract to appear on this years...
Racist arsehole in Spanish hospital after falling ill with pneumonia
A violent, egomaniacal racist arsehole is being treated for pneumonia after being admitted to hospital in Majorca.
JK Rowling Announces New Harry Potter Book
In a move sure to delight her legion of fans, JK Rowling has let slip to the World a new book in the series.
“I did not have fap relations with my work computer” says Damien Green
The beleaguered Secretary of State is still denying accusations of downloading and viewing porn like a teen with two dicks on his office computer...
Clive Dunn in Nazi uniform outrage
Dad's Army Star Clive Dunn has apologised after being pictured wearing a Nazi uniform.
The Sun on Sunday published pictures of the celebrity actor and...
Game of Thrones is more Narnia With Knockers than Tolkien With Tits says Andrew...
Comedy cultural commentator and serial gag-pincher Andrew Neil has disagreed with the Herald's analysis of Game of Thrones.
"Lord of the Rings is densely written,...
Local Nun in record attempt to raise the roof
A local Nun from Sacred Heart Church in Rochdale could soon become famous for a world record attempt if, with the help of The...
Boris Johnson evades detection to win 2020 season of Hunted
Using an impressive combination of stealth, sneakiness and bare-faced cheek, Prime Minister Boris Johnson has trounced both his opponents and his pursuers to claim...
Pokémon Go! the new surfing
With the craze sweeping the world, it appears that 'Pokémon Go!' has overtaken surfing as the world's coolest hobby.
According to a new survey in...
I wish it could be Brexit everyday
When the pounds begins to fall
and economic growth begins to stall
It puts a great big smile on a remainer’s face
If you dive...
Birds of Prey sue rock band the Eagles
In a landmark case the popular American rock band The Eagles are being sued by a flock of birds for use of the band's...
Poisonous snake first to leave I’m A Celebrity after failing to overcome fear of...
The program known for subjecting contestants to creepy crawlies, scary animals and filthy challenges is facing a crisis after it has emerged that none...
Hampstead Heath Glory Holes to close in respect for George Michael
Regular visitors to Hampsted Heath have been informed all glory holes will be closed from tomorrow as a mark of respect to George Michael.
A...
Idris Elba to play Mary Poppins in long awaited Disney remake
Idris Elba has been cast as Mary Poppins in the long awaited Disney remake of Mary Poppins.
Competition was fierce for the role with Jodie...
Celebrity chefs ranked most important profession in the world
In an online survey comprising over 10,000 people, Celebrity Chefs ranked number 1 in a choice of 100 of the most important and influential...



















































