Complete sadist buys 2 year old nephew a keyboard for Christmas
A man from Rochdale has bought his nephew the gift of music for Christmas.
Stan Still told us, "I've played in bands since I was...
Just £300,000 a month can feed a footballer for a whole week. Please give...
It can be harrowing, truly tragic to see, to see a young, athletic, talented man to have to survive in squalid conditions, living on...
Rochdale Banking Firm NM Rothschild and Sons Hail Brexit Vote as a “victory for...
Billionaire currency traders were jubilant after night of uncertainty saw the pound tumble to a 31 year low after reaching a five year high...
Global economy near collapse after George Osborne pulls sickie
It has been revealed that once George Osborne takes up his post as Editor of the London Evening Standard, his importance to the global...
World in shock after professional boxer wins boxing match against amateur boxer
The sporting world is in disarray this morning after an unbeaten professional boxer won a boxing match against a bloke who hadn't had a...
North Korean rapper DMZ launches attack on US Charts with Pyongyang Style
North Korean rap artist DMZ 'exploded' into the US Billboard charts today with his latest hit "Pyongyang Style".
The song, which is his own twist...
Victoria Beckham tipped for MBE in New Year’s Honours List
Victoria Beckham's aspirations to become really "posh" were finally realised when it was announced that she will be awarded an OBE in the New Year's Honours List.
New Far Right Perfume Released.
In order to capitalise on the mood of the country at the moment, the ex-UKIP leader Nigel Farage is to release a new perfume...
Jesus admits, hollow easter eggs represent my empty promises
Jesus has clarified that hollow chocolate eggs symbolise the hollowness and empty promises at the heart of all religions.
Jesus, or "The Light", as he...
Sheffield Council declare majority of citizens think world is flat
Sheffield Council has been forced to declare their belief in a flat earth after applying the same statistical analysis to a recent on-line poll...
Pound Pinches Parisian Patterning – Press and Paparazzi Perplexed
Scandal hits the UK economy once again as the new £1 coin (GBP) is accused of fashion plagiarism by the Continental Euro (EUR).
Speaking via Text...
Voters must provide family coat of arms as ID insists government
The government has been accused of the suppression of voters' rights after plans to introduce compulsory checks of a family coat of arms for...
Pensioners with British Gas look forward to choosing between freezing and starving to death...
"My pension didn't cover the old price. In fact, the only reason I didn't freeze to death last year is because I was able to burn all the ‘late Payment’ notices that British Gas kept sending out"
Coronavirus equals UK mortality rate of Michael Barrymore’s swimming pool
The Government has announced that as many people in the UK have died from Coronavirus as have been found dead in Michael Barrymore's swimming...
DUP explains kneecapping naughtier than running through wheat field
Talks between the Conservatives and the DUP are said to be ongoing as the PM desperately tries to cobble together a slim working majority...
Americans horrified to learn what the word ‘amendment’ means
As hillbillies, rednecks and evangelical Christian right wing crackpots continue to celebrate the last thrashings of America's hold on reality with their ongoing support...
