Goldie

Who the fuck is Goldie, asks Banksy

2
The deliberately modest and ultra secretive celebrity, Goldie, yesterday potentially revealed  the identity of serial graffiti artist and liberal metropolitan elite caricature, Banksy, in...
Farage

Right wing nutjob calls right wing nutjob a right wing nutjob

0
Leading members of the Right Wing Nutjobs Association have been flinging accusations around willy-nilly to the amusement of 'leftie libtards' everywhere. Right wing nutjob...

BBC bans racist song White Christmas

0
The BBC working on advice from Institute for Cultural Correctness has announced that the song, White Christmas is to be banned. Spokeswoman for the perpetually...

All Future Covers Of David Bowie Hit To Be Recorded As Life On Titan

0
The David Bowie hit Life On Mars is getting a slight posthumous makeover, it would appear. In response to NASA’s announcement about the possibility of...
Angry man, steam coming from ears

BBC Announce Sequel to ‘Bake Off’

0
Following the loss of ‘The Great British Bake Off’ to a rival commercial channel, the BBC have been struggling to come up with another...
Piers Morgan

Piers Morgan caught rummaging through bins looking for the smirk that’s been wiped off...

0
Voice mail enthusiast and professional shit stirrer, Piers Morgan, has been spotted scouring the bins behind a Lidl in Hammersmith. The toe faced smarm slinger...
Rees Mogg

Freestyle rapper, Rees-Moggy Mogg to win back Conservative youth vote

32
In a bid to appear more accessible to young people the Conservative party have updated the image of some of their more prominent MPs. The...

Trump appoints Mark E Smith as musical ambassador to Europe. Uh.

0
US president Donald Trump has sent shockwaves through "tin pan ally" by appointing Fall front man and legendary curmudgeon Mark E Smith as his...
Sad Man

Record complaints at Ofcom as latest episode of ‘Tits and Swords’ contains no tits

11
Switchboards at UK TV regulators Ofcom were jammed last night after the eagerly anticipated first episode of the new series of Game of Thrones...
Middle Aged Man

Man ‘still hip’ because he likes new bands like Radiohead

24
Derek Brasshouse, 54, an accountant in Rochdale Borough Council's swimming pool department, considers himself to be still 'with it' because he enjoys new bands...

Writers of Brexit admit they’ve no idea how to end it and it’s going...

0
The writers behind the hit show, Brexit say they've no idea how to end the show and there are fears it could turn into...
Pyongyang Style

North Korean rapper DMZ launches attack on US Charts with Pyongyang Style

0
North Korean rap artist DMZ 'exploded' into the US Billboard charts today with his latest hit "Pyongyang Style". The song, which is his own twist...

Doctor Who goes back to Gallifrey after announcing ‘I give up’

0
The protector of earth with more faces than Big Ben made the announcement on The One Show on Friday. Reflecting on the past 50 year of...

Man who’s ‘sick of reboots’ stops watching them

0
A man who claims that reboots of movies shouldn't be allowed because they always ruin the originals has stopped watching them. Trevor Sallis, an office...

La La Land Eclipses Titanic Record for ‘Most Men Forced to Watch Chick-Flick’

10
La La Land, the 2016 American romantic musical comedy-drama film starring Ryan Gosling and Emma Stone, has shattered the record of 'Titanic' as the...

Nigel Farage cast as Pinocchio in reboot of Disney classic

0
Arron Banks is tipped to direct in his feature debut having amassed an impressive CV of smaller films targeted at indie audiences.

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