Gallagher in filthy pool party outrage
Our colleagues at the Swindon Advertiser have told us that bacteria in the water has resulted in the Oasis pool being shut for the...
Mary Berry to retire from television
With the news that The Great British Bake-Off is to move to Channel 4, host and national treasure Mary Berry has announced her retirement...
Pinocchio to play Nigel Farage in hotly awaited biopic
Requests from the public to name the film have had to be abandoned. They were either correctly spelled expletives or poorly written praise so hard to comprehend that the staffer responsible for sifting through the responses incurred a nose bleed.
Seinfeld fan offended by ‘white free’ Luke Cage series
Rochdale couch tuber, Archibald Taggart, has hidden himself away behind a fort made entirely of his Friends and Seinfeld video and DVD box sets,...
Songwriter reveals “Always something there to remind me” was written about Herpes
The Burt Bacharach song, "Always something there to remind me" was written about Herpes. Or that's according to a new documentary to be screened...
I’m A Celebrity host seen tampering with a parachute following announcement that K***e H*****s...
Following the shock decision to give Ms Hopkins, who has been sacked from numerous broadcasting jobs because of her wordhole, a spot on one...
ITV to rival Gogglebox with show about idiots watching morons watching television
Channel 4 have been ratings kings for the last few years with their flagship show, Gogglebox.
In the surprise smash idiots get to watch...
Candice wins Great British Pout Off 2016
Candice from Bedfordshire has won The Great British Pout Off after ten gruelling weeks of televised puckering.
Bake Off Champion Candice announces conversion to Islam
Candice Clay, winner of the 2016 Great British Bake off, has sensationally announced She is converting to Islam.
Cliff Richard still not a nonce confirms BBC
Singer, God-botherer and long term bachelor for no particular reason is still not suspected of fiddling with young men, according to a BBC report.
The...
Doctor Who goes back to Gallifrey after announcing ‘I give up’
The protector of earth with more faces than Big Ben made the announcement on The One Show on Friday.
Reflecting on the past 50 year of...
Local Entrepreneur Makes Big Hit On Dragon’s Den
Local businessman Vinnie 'Fingers' McPherson entered the big league in the world of high finance today when his appearance on TV's popular Dragon's Den show took...
Experts agree that Josh Widdicombe is not bigger than Jesus
Theologists now agree that diminutive Josh Widdicombe is not the Second Coming of Our Lord Jesus Christ.
Speculation had run rife that, having been born...
Pokémon Go! the new surfing
With the craze sweeping the world, it appears that 'Pokémon Go!' has overtaken surfing as the world's coolest hobby.
According to a new survey in...
Farage takes on Eurovision
In a shock move today, the rubber faced, racist, people's champion Nigel Farage has announced his intentions to represent Great Britain in next year's...
Tolkein With Tits set to dominate office conversations as Game of Thrones returns
As the umpteenth series of the godawful fantasy franchise "Game of Thrones" is due to air on Murdoch-vision this week, those with more refined...
