Kate Middleton and Meghan Markle should settle rift with bikini jelly wrestling demand Daily...

0
Daily Express readers have today demanded that Meghan Markle and Kate Middleton settle their differences with a bout of bikini jelly wrestling. Express reader, Ian...

Nurses and Firemen organise whip-round to help pensioner do up her house

15
Well off government workers including nurses, firemen and the police are banding together to help impoverished pensioner, Liz, 91, from Windsor. 'We heard about the...

Prince Philip to be dismantled following cladding inspection failure

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HRH the Duke Of Edinburgh to be decommissioned and scrapped after failing Health and Safety tests. Sad scenes at Buckingham Palace today as Prince Philip...

Prince Harry ruled unfit for work by ATOS

2
Prince Harry has been ruled unfit for work by ATOS after attending a work capability assessment. "The Prince was sanctioned last month after he missed...

Awkward moment for Prince Andrew at nativity as virgin told she will have a...

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There were awkward scenes for Prince Andrew today at a nativity in Sandringham when a virgin was told she will  have a baby. The Prince...

Queen’s Christmas speech will contain one paragraph in Urdu

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There are rumours today that the Queen's Christmas speech will contain one paragraph in Urdu. A furious Palace insider told us, "It's completely ridiculous. I've...

Prince Andrew says, I was at Pizza Express checking out Beatrice’s fit friend

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Prince Andrew has today sought to clarify comments he made about attending Pizza Express in Woking 19 years ago. A spokesman for Prince Andrew said,...

Unemployed layabout doesn’t want £350m a year job shaking hands and waving

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The people of the United Kingdom were reassured this morning by Prince Harry's statement that he does not want to be king and will...
Kate Middleton

Bloke In A Pub Claims Responsibility For Royal Pregnancy

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A bloke in a pub has claimed that the Duchess of Cambridge’s unborn child is his, reports have confirmed. Unemployed Willie Eckerslike, 42, from Rochdale,...
Corgi

Queen deciding which Corgi to shoot first if Corbyn becomes Prime Minister

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Buckingham Palace sources have reported that the Queen is currently trying to decide which of her Corgis to shoot first should Jeremy Corbyn be...

Rolf Harris to paint The Queen again for TV comeback special

8
Former popular television presenter to repaint Her Majesty Queen Elizabeth following release from prison. Rolf Harris, 87, is rumoured to be looking at the possibility...

“I didn’t want to go to your poxy wedding anyway” says Theresa May

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Prime Minister of the United Kingdom of Great Britain and Northern Ireland, Theresa May, has announced that she didn't want to go to the...
Queen and Philip

Queen’s Speech delayed as Elizabeth II seeks treatment for stress related Tourette’s 

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Security has been increased at King Edward VII hospital, where it is believed her Majesty the Queen is currently undergoing treatment for an acute...
Meghan and Harry

Marrying melanin maddens media more than molesting minors

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As news broke that Harry and Meghan have decided to quit their jobs to spend less time with their family, the country braced itself...

It was straightforward shooting not sex, says Prince Andrew

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Young girls were released into the Sandringham Estate and shot at as part of Ghislaine Maxwell's birthday celebrations, Prince Andrew has revealed. The Duke of...

Prince Philip in grim reaper racist remark gaffe

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Hospital staff were apparently left flabbergasted at the Duke of Edinburgh's casually racist remarks during a recent impromptu visit by Death, the harvester of...

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