Cameron brings attention to himself to avoid attention being on him
David Cameron, pig-fiddling, radish-faced ex-PM has decided to step down as an MP.
Cameron, who nobody has so much as glanced at in Parliament since...
Daily Mail editor on suicide watch as rumours of Mo Farah knighthood circulate
There are genuine fears for the editor of The Daily Mail after a Somali born Muslim Immigrant ran to a double double victory at...
Lord Lucan, Pol Pot, Martin Borman ,Abu Bakr al-Baghdadi and Boko Haram emerge from...
An entire top shelf of global mass murderers have signalled they plan to emerge from hiding following the announcement by US president Donald trump...
Is Daily Mail Editor Paul Dacre the most flaccid cockgoblin in the UK?
Unsubstantiated sources allege Dacre is comfortably the vilest hate-peddling shitweasel in the UK.
Feel free to tell us if you disagree with these allegations. But...
Hampstead Heath Glory Holes to close in respect for George Michael
Regular visitors to Hampsted Heath have been informed all glory holes will be closed from tomorrow as a mark of respect to George Michael.
A...
Police eager to establish if pound coin thrown at Burnley FC player was projectile...
A Burnley fan who threw a pound coin at Joe Hart is on the run from Police today after authorities claim he is now...
Olympic movement rocked by revelation that Russia has an anti-doping lab
News is breaking today that Russia, much to the surprise of the international sporting community actually has an anti-doping laboratory.
Whistle-blower Grigory Radchenkov, the former...
Corbyn criticised over links to NWA
Controversial Labour leader Jeremy Corbyn has been heavily criticised for his links to rap group NWA. A picture of Jeremy "terrorists are my mates" Corbyn sipping gin and juice with rapper Easy E has been largely shared across social media.
Kentucky Fried Chicken unaffected by chicken shortage, thousands of cats reported missing
KFC has opened more of its outlets in the UK despite running completely out of chicken.
Coronavirus equals UK mortality rate of Michael Barrymore’s swimming pool
The Government has announced that as many people in the UK have died from Coronavirus as have been found dead in Michael Barrymore's swimming...
Radio 2 announces replacement of all Christmas songs with Call to Prayer to avoid...
If you want any chance of hearing any of your favourite Christmas tunes, then you better tune in to this week.
Radio 2 has today...
Boris resigns to spend more time in storm drain beckoning to children
Boris Johnson has resigned from his position as foreign secretary today, and has returned to his natural role as a malevolent entity which preys...
Far Right groups threaten to tear down statues of Prophet Mohammed
Far right groups have pledged to tear down all statues of the Prophet Mohammed following the recent scoop in the Daily Express that the...
Daily Mail readers die from apoplexy after Muslim Immigrant wins Gold
Lord Rothermere is expected to file for bankruptcy on Monday after the last of his Daily Mail readers died of apoplexy following the 10,000m...
Donald Trump to appoint Mr Muscle™ as his new Coronavirus advisor
In a move that has been described as both "batshit crazy" and "utterly, utterly mental", US President Donald Trump has revealed plans to appoint...
Surprise as West Ham Fan runs 50 yards on pitch without stopping for fag...
It has been crowned the greatest sporting achievement at the London Stadium since the 2012 Olympics.
There was shock and surprise as a West Ham...
