‘Deadly viruses don’t kill people, people kill people,’ claims Ebola
In a bid to improve its reputation as one of the world's most lethal pathogens, the Ebola virus has today sought to shift the...
Ryanair to charge depressed passengers for emotional baggage
Ryanair have today announced that they will start charging depressed passengers for bringing emotional baggage with them onto their flights.
The budget airline has said...
Outrage as women flout Burkini ban on Rochdale beach
Police were called yesterday afternoon after a large group of women were caught flouting the controversial "Burkini Ban" on Rochdale's world famous Stansfield Beach.
Members...
Tommy Robinson thrown out of restaurant after complaining about ‘Allah Cart’ menu
Tommy Robinson has been thrown out of a restaurant in Oldham after a campaign event today after starting a row with the manager over...
World in shock after professional boxer wins boxing match against amateur boxer
The sporting world is in disarray this morning after an unbeaten professional boxer won a boxing match against a bloke who hadn't had a...
Dead mice brought in by cats to be declared part of household income in...
Cat-owners are now being asked to count any rodents or birds left on their doorstep as declarable earnings in their application for means-tested benefits,...
Prince Charles admits years of talking to vegetables perfect preparation for Trump visit
Prince Charles has confirmed that years of talking to vegetables at Highgrove are the perfect preparation for meeting Donald Trump today.
There's been a...
Wanker punches Dickhead. Dickhead in serious condition
News is emerging from Belgium today that a wanker has punched a dickhead and the dickhead is in a serious condition with a bleed on the brain.
Prince Philip declared fit to work by Atos
Prince Philip has been declared fit for work by Atos less than an hour after he was admitted to hospital yesterday.
Officials said "that...
Corbyn criticised over links to NWA
Controversial Labour leader Jeremy Corbyn has been heavily criticised for his links to rap group NWA. A picture of Jeremy "terrorists are my mates" Corbyn sipping gin and juice with rapper Easy E has been largely shared across social media.
Brexit a Fucking Shambles, Says John Major
Former Prime Minister and voice of reason John Major has confirmed in a speech that the ongoing government brexit negotiations are a fucking shambles.
Major,...
Young children advised to wash hands after licking floors, walls, windows, banister rails and...
Young children around the UK have been advised that the best way to stop the spread of Coronavirus is by thoroughly washing their hands...
Daily Mail editor defends decision to exclude Gold medallist with alopecia from cover
The editor at the Daily Mail has allegedly defended his decision to only put two of the gold medalists from the four woman, world...
‘Off to free Tommy Robinson’ replaces ‘dropping kids off at the pool’ as UK’s...
News is just in that spot poll of everybody in the UK has revealed today that the UK's favourite synonym for taking a dump...
Supermassive black hole found at the heart of the Conservative Party
Scientists working at Rochdale university announced Monday that they have proved the existence of supermassive black hole at the heart of the Conservative Party.
"Imagine...
Corbyn stuns Glastonbury with acapella cover of Prodigy’s Firestarter on Pyramid Stage
Jeremy Corbyn left the bustling fields of Glastonbury in stunned silence this afternoon after performing an accapella ballad of the renowned Prodigy song 'Firestarter'.
Corbyn...
