Bake Off viewers shocked as Paul Hollywood offers Manon Lagreve an iced finger

0
Great British Bake Off viewers have been taking to social media tonight in anger after Paul Hollywood offered contestant Manon Lagreve an iced finger. Bernadette...
Burnley FC

Police eager to establish if pound coin thrown at Burnley FC player was projectile...

0
A Burnley fan who threw a pound coin at Joe Hart is on the run from Police today after authorities claim he is now...

Rochdale man jailed for putting milk in tea before taking out teabag

0
A Rochdale man has been jailed for seven years for crimes against tea, it has been reported today. Steve Dickinson, 42 and a bit, was...
Old Graduate

University of Life under Ofsted investigation after turning out complete fucking idiots

83
Chief Ofsted inspector Mark Teachers announced today he would be launching a special investigation into the University of Life, based in Thanet. A lower-level investigation...

Scientists admit Rees-Mogg is experiment to create the perfect twat

0
There was mild surprise today, as the lid was blown off a secret program revealing that Tory MP Jacob Rees-Mogg was the product of...

NHS gift vouchers to become nation’s favourite christmas stocking fillers

0
People up and down the country will be able to show their loved ones how much they care by buying gift vouchers for NHS...
Ann Widdecombe

Humans cured of sexuality after imagining Ann Widdecombe masturbating in the bath

Scientists from Rochdale's Community University have finally managed to find a cure for human sexuality after asking people to imagine Ann Widdecombe fiddling with...

Sign up to The Rochdale Herald Newsletter

0
The technical gods at The Rochdale Herald have built a very special daily newsletter that goes out every day at 5pm by email. If you...

Stop being rebellious formerly rebellious Labour rebel tells rebellious Labour rebels

0
The formerly rebellious Labour rebel, Jeremy Corbyn, has told rebellious Labour rebels to stop being rebellious or else.

All Future Covers Of David Bowie Hit To Be Recorded As Life On Titan

0
The David Bowie hit Life On Mars is getting a slight posthumous makeover, it would appear. In response to NASA’s announcement about the possibility of...
England fans

Mixed feelings for Tommy Robinson supporters as bloke called Ali puts England into semi...

0
Ruddy faced racists up and down the country are said to have mixed feelings about England getting through to the World Cup Semi Finals...

London sewer found clogged with dreams of the young after government flushes future down...

17
Sewer workers in the London area of Whitechapel have reportedly found the dreams of the young decomposing in a giant blockage in the system...

Buzzfeed pulls ‘Which terrorist group are you?’ quiz after complaints

Entertainment website Buzzfeed has withdrawn its ‘Which terrorist group are you?’ quiz following user complaints. The website removed the quiz on Tuesday afternoon, and...

OUTRAGE as Middle Eastern immigrant cast as Mary in school nativity play

0
A Rochdale primary school has come under fire from parents for casting a 9 year old Palestinian immigrant as the virgin Mary in the...

David Blunkett confirms he’s still blind following driving test

The Rochdale Herald can exclusively confirm that David Blunkett is still blind. Mr Blunkett confirmed the findings of his most recent eye sight test...

Jeremy Corbyn insists he’ll remain Labour leader even after death

0
Serial metaphorical and actual seat avoider, and leader of a thousand students ineligible to vote, Jeremy Corbyn, has announced that nothing will stop him ruining the...

Follow us

61,169FansLike
29,631FollowersFollow
21,670FollowersFollow

Popular Posts