Warnings issued magic mushroom Brexit brexitius causes hallucinations of £350M week for NHS
Health officials in the United Kingdom issued warnings today regarding the consumption of a new species of magic mushroom called ‘Brexit brexitius’ as consumers...
Labour Proposes New Tax on Books
Labour Party Central Office has announced that it would consider forcing book publishers to pay a levy to help pay for Momentum leaflets and...
Nigerian Prince perplexed no one wants free money
Prince Terry Ojukwu III, of Nigeria, recently ran into financial difficulties when his bank fell into administration, leaving him just 24 hours to withdraw...
Michael Gove is somebody’s favourite for something
Michael Gove's mum has spoken of her delight this morning after her son was described as somebody's favourite, including her's, for the first time...
Brexit transition period ends when the EU says it ends, says Philip Hammond
The Chancellor Philip Hammond offered much needed clarity on the government's Brexit project today, by confirming it will enter a transition period which will...
May red faced after failure to personally deliver EU nationals deportation letters
The Office of the Prime Minister Theresa May served up a rare slice of humble pie as Ms May apologised for not personally handing...
Prince Harry and Meghan to get holiday from going on holiday
The palace has revealed this morning that plans are in place to give the Duke and Duchess of Sussex a well deserved break from...
Scientists baffled as average IQ of North Korea drops 20% this afternoon
SScientists around the world are struggling to make sense of strange information coming out of North Korea this afternoon after the average IQ of...
Theresa May to woo younger voters with some fava beans and a nice chianti
It was announced this morning by ToryDinners4U, a think tank specially focused on food service and traditional conservative values, that the prime minister will...
Morrissey spends days in bed
Tragic news has reached us here at The Rochdale Herald for all lovers of the morbid mopheaded muso and former front man of The...
Game of Thrones is more Narnia With Knockers than Tolkien With Tits says Andrew...
Comedy cultural commentator and serial gag-pincher Andrew Neil has disagreed with the Herald's analysis of Game of Thrones.
"Lord of the Rings is densely written,...
Secretary of State for Education, Justine Greening shows concern for pupils “Not talk good”
In the UK, education has always been of paramount significance, on par with the National Health Service, or ensuring that MPs have enough income...
Conservative MPs unable to point to their constituency on a map
A recent survey has revealed that a staggering 89% of Tory MPs are unable to findtheir constituency on a map.
The survey results, which were...
For Fuck’s Sake, sighs Britain
The entire United Kingdom muttered "for fuck's sake" in unision yesterday afternoon after learning that Boris Johnson has been "elected: new Conservative leader and...
Syrian Parents outraged by cost of Trips to Disneyland
Syrian parents took to social media yesterday in support of Jon Platt, the British father who the Supreme Court deemed to have broken the...
Rooney Returns to Everton because ‘I missed my Nan’
Overweight, red faced, former England captain Wayne Rooney is to leave Manchester United to return to his first club Everton as part of a...
