The most recent figures for the UK Prison Population gender gap show men getting sent down at record levels with women going down barely at all. As the number of prisoners hits 126,000 and an amazing 122,000 of those are men with a headcount of only 4,000 women.

In protest MP Keith Vaz has offered to stage a sit-on at an all-boys Youth Detention Centre in Essex. However sources are telling us at the Rochdale Herald that this gag is about a cheap fellatio innuendo and not about Keith Vaz saying “take your shirt off – I’m going to attack you” to a rent-boy.