The Australian Federal Opposition has called for a Royal Commission into Royal Commissions
In an extraordinary turn of events in Australia Opposition Immigration Minister Aidan Androyd has declared the "necessity for this Royal Commission."
"Well, I tried to...
Labour NEC can take your money and run – rules court of appeal
The NEC of the Labour Party has won on appeal its right to lie its arse off in order to get three quid out...
Controversy Rages Over New Polymer Five Pound Note
In one month's time, the Bank Of England will roll out the new polymer five pound banknote, replacing and ultimately phasing out the familiar...
Local man in critical condition after accidentally hearing Vanessa Feltz on the radio
A local man is in a critical but stable condition at Rochdale General Infirmary after accidentally driving off a bridge into the River Roch...
M1 & M6 become sentient
The Department for Transport has today revealed that its works to upgrade sections of the M6 and M1 to 'Smart' motorways have taken so...
Britain’s first halal food bank to open in Rochdale
News that the UK's first halal food bank is to open in Rochdale this week was greeted enthusiastically by local residents and village elders...
Piers Morgan behaves like a d**k on Twitter, again
Piers Morgan has taken to Twitter to characteristically behave like an utter tit today.
Morgan, whose only physical accomplishment of note was to fall off...
Twitter Definitely Closing Down Next Year
Rumours that Twitter is to close for good in 2019 were confirmed today by some random user.
"I kno sm1 on inside. #Twitter defo closing...
BBC News “Medal Rush” Satire Wins Best Joke Award At Edinburgh
In a break from tradition the funniest joke award at ths years Edinburgh Festival has been awarded to BBC News.
"Normally we just look for...
Canoeist wins Olympic Gold for canoeing
A canoeist fulfilled a lifetime's ambition last night after winning Olympic Gold for Britain in Rio.
The Rochdale Herald would like to congratulate the canoeist...
Social Media punishing the pound in Postal workers pockets
With the rise and rise of Facebook, E-Cards and Internet banking the way we celebrate important events with family and friends is fast changing.
Nowadays...
Diver and Synchronised Partner win Olympic Gold
In a bizarre twist that no one seems to understand, two unknown divers who were neither Tom Daley nor his synchronised diving partner have...
Rochdale PR firms enters FTSE 250 after winning Simon Danczuk crisis management contract
There was jubilation in Rochdale this afternoon as Clifford Savile Associates PLC announced their entry into the FTSE 250 for the first time.
The news...
Thousands dead in Daily Mail Olympics tragedy
Thousands of Daily Mail readers are dead today after their heads exploded whilst reading the rag's coverage of the Olympics.
Mild confusion over the juxtaposition...
Tom Daley admits pissing in pool
Great British diving legend Tom Daley, who recently claimed Bronze in the synchronized diving with his partner (Dan something or other), has sensationally confessed...
Greggs is not for us; says Jersey
Pasty super chain and northern nutrition giant Greggs is to close its doors in the tax haven of Jersey after just 18 months of...
