News that the UK’s first halal food bank is to open in Rochdale this week was greeted enthusiastically by local residents and village elders alike.

Visitors to the food bank will have to remove their shoes and recite some lyrics from the Koran to prove they’re at least open to the idea of converting to Islam before being eligible for food.

Volunteers at Tameside Mosque foodbank

Actually that’s nonsense. All you have to be is hungry and they’ll help you.

The issue of food poverty is no laughing matter, frankly how we can pretend to be a civilised society when there are people in the UK without enough food for their children is frankly horrifying, but let’s have a go anyway.

For people dumb enough to be outraged by the idea that a mosque is running a food bank, you need to take a long hard look in the mirror and make sure that you’re angry about hungry people and not about who is trying to feed them.

Many, many mosques and Sikh temples feed the hungry everyday, and no, Rochdale isn’t the first and it won’t be the last. This was clickbait, thanks for reading.

If you are experiencing food poverty in Rochdale please visit.

neelimosque.org

Or

rochdale.foodbank.org.uk

info@rochdale.foodbank.org.uk

Quentin D Fortesqueue is a founding editor of The Rochdale Herald. Part time amateur narcissist and full time satirist Quentin is never happier than when playing his lute and drinking a full bodied Bordeaux. He rarely plays the lute and never gets to drink Bordeaux.