Young people cause cancer Daily Mail warns
The Daily Mail has exclusively revealed that British youth is causing cancer.
In its article on the subject the Mail pointed out that British youths...
Corbyn stands on box labelled Schrödinger’s jobs brexit at Labour conference
The Labour conference in Brighton today will feature an entertaining diversion when national treasure Jeremy Corbyn takes to the stage and stands on a...
Trump Press Secretary buys fireproof underpants
The secret of Press Secretary Sean Spicer's propensity for hyperbolic bullshitacity has been revealed.
He has reportedly been wearing a revolutionary new type of asbestos...
Full blown Brexit testing on monkeys halted after everything in lab just f*cking died
David Davis, lead researcher in the government's secretive Brexit Lab, has announced that Brexit testing on monkeys has been halted after everything in the...
May convinced she needs one more f*cking slogan to convince country to back austerity
The Prime Minister is said to be personally convinced another f*cking slogan will convince the entire country to back austerity.
Catchphrases repeated to the point...
Blairite Entryism Not A Big Deal, Insist Blairites
It was revealed today that a Blairite peer, a hedge fund manager, several rich business types and a Liberal Democrat Lord were behind the...
Florence and the McMachine
McDonald's is suing Florence over claims that the historic city is "promoting a healthy diet & lifestyle contrary to Western values
Trump redefines Pre-existing Conditions as type of terror
A new kind of terrorism is trying to destroy the great American dream, according to the Trump Administration today.
“Pre-existing conditions are trying to ruin...
Car bombs not as bad as nicking stationery insists Martin ‘I’m a politician’ McGuiness
Former number three in the Irish presidential election Seamus Martin Pointa McGuinness has resigned from his position as Deputy First Minister of Northern Ireland.
The...
Smart Energy may help me keep job – says National Grid boss
The new head of the National Grid, Nicola Shaw, has today encouraged consumers to opt for "smart energy" devices which will enable her to...
Herald Editor panic attack after millennial asks him “what is NATO?”
The editor of The Rochdale Herald was sectioned briefly today following a conversation with a millennial during which he was asked "what's NATO".
This is your eighty seventh and FINAL warning Corbyn tells Labour MPs
After 52 of Jeremy Coalbin's unruly red rabble voted against the party whip over the Article 50 vote in parliament, the Labour leader has...
Neil Armstrong’s body to be exhumed and tested for moon dust
President Donald Trump is understood to have ordered an investigation into whether or not the first moon landing ever happened on this day in...
May gives UK schools education 101
Prime Minister Theresa May has heralded education reforms by telling UK schools that there will be "no return to the binary system of the...
Survey reveals homeless choose to live on streets so they cannot appear on Come...
To many, the issue of homelessness invokes thoughts of a person falling on hard times, perhaps even drink, drugs, or criminality. Now, the latest...
Theresa May to be replaced by heavy slow moving rain shower
“Rain shower means rain shower."
