Labour Party member forced to deny he’s joined a cult

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A Labour Party member who has attended their conference has been forced to deny he has joined a cult. Bill Board has spent the last...
KFC

Extreme weather leaves KFC with too much chicken

0
As 'The Beast From The East' takes a firm hold across the UK, KFC have announced that it is overrun with chicken as no...

May criticised for scheduling Queen’s speech on Day of Rage

1
After weeks of uncertainty tinged with tragedy, the hard right fanatical Tories have been hammering out a deal with the DUP, which will finally...

Fears 40% of millenials may never have tedious home improvement conversations

0
There are fears that up to 40% of millennials may never be able to have tedious home improvement conversations. Fewer and fewer people are able...

Government should save people’s shop John Lewis says man who hasn’t been in since...

0
A Rochdale man has demanded that the Government step in if the retailer John Lewis goes bust. There are fears that the retailer may...
Hideous Bathroom Suite

Sheffield City Council declares state of emergency after residents are forced to have a...

0
Sheffield City Council have declared a state of emergency after some residents reported taking a bath. Brightside resident Stand Still told us, "It's been 12...
Celebrating Man

Rochdale man abandons Marxism after winning £10 on lottery

5
A Rochdale resident has been explaining how winning £10 on the lottery has made him re-evaluate his position on Marxism. Shea Bukharin told the Herald,...
Christmas Presents

Now for something different, our Big Fat Secret Santa

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Along with the very fine and folk at NewsThump and The Southend News Network we have put together what we think could be one...
Demolition

New EU regulations will require all new houses to have Toulouse

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Flush from the success of Brexit, the EU Commission has been swift to demonstrate what the future looks like without a good hard Brit. ...

Arsonists shocked building they set on fire is burning

0
A group of arsonists have spoken of their shock at discovering that a building they've spent a decade carefully trying to set fire to...

Theresa May announces Leyland Daf to build next generation Brexit-fighter in Preston

28
Theresa May has announced that the UK will be leaving the Eurofighter Programme immediately. BAE Systems will be closing its Eurofighter factory in the...
Game of Thrones

Tolkein With Tits set to dominate office conversations as Game of Thrones returns

4
As the umpteenth series of the godawful fantasy franchise "Game of Thrones" is due to air on Murdoch-vision this week, those with more refined...

UKIP launch investigation into how 3 of its members managed to read a map

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UKIP have launched an immediate inquiry into how 3 of its members managed to read a map and several signs to find a book...

Colonel Mustard blames the Housing Minister in the Cabinet Office with the Funding Cuts

2
Colonel Mustard has alleged that the housing minister, in the cabinet office, with the funding cuts caused the Grenfell fire.   The Colonel, wearing a...

Russian Government says it asked Arron Banks to organise a trip to Salisbury Cathedral

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Arron Banks has said that he only spoke to Russian Government officials because they had asked him to organise a tour of Salisbury Cathedral....
Tony the Tiger

Tony the Tiger loses paw to Type 2 diabetes

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Tony the Tiger, the face of the Frosties breakfast cereal brand since 1952, has according to sources, lost a paw to Type 2 diabetes. Mr...

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