Labour Conference to go ahead as Dennis Skinner with baseball bat confirmed as security
The Labour Party have announced that their conference will go ahead despite G4S laughing in their faces when begged to supply security.
"We are sorry...
Expat Moans About EU Citizens in UK
A British expat has hailed Parliament's rejection of EU citizens' right to stay in the UK post Brexit.
Speaking from beside his swimming pool at...
Superdry jumpers are actually a completely normal amount of dry, reveal scientists
Scientists from Rochdale Community University have proven conclusively that Superdry jumpers are, in fact, just a normal amount of dry like all other jumpers.
The...
Buckingham Palace announces Prince Andrew to tour Paris road tunnels
Buckingham Palace has announced that Prince Andrew will go on a state visit of Parisian road tunnels later this week.
In a statement a spokesman...
Ransomware means government absolutely definitley needs to read your Snapchat
The recent ransomware attack on the NHS and many others across the world definitely means that GCHQ need to read your email, announced...
Weather still not good enough to lure sulky teenager out of his bedroom
Despite the change in the weather, cloudless skies and temperatures in the high 20s, it is still not enough to persuade moody teenager, Damian...
Cat who shit in litter tray lined with Daily Mail appointed editor
A cat who took a poo in a litter tray lined with a copy of the Daily Mail has been named as new editor...
Daily Mail photo editor awarded the Iron Cross
The chief photo editor for The Daily Mail has been awarded the Iron Cross this afternoon.
A spokesman for The Daily Mail said, "This award...
Picture yourself in their shoes
A picture of Omran Daqneesh, the five year old boy who was pulled from the rubble that used to be his home in Aleppo,...
Farage Security Concern as Public learn sense can be knocked into UKIP MEP
Steven Woolfe, the UKIP MEP, is being hailed as a “Medical Miracle” after becoming the 1st person in history to have had sense knocked into him.
Daily Express readers warned to brace for worst winter in 5 billion years
The Daily Express has reported that Britain is to experience the worst winter for the last 5bn years.
John Muir, of Inexact weather forecasting said,...
Geordie accused of ‘cultural appropriation’ after wearing jacket during night out
A Geordie is being criticised by social media users for posting an Instagram photo of her wearing a jacket during a night out on...
Scottish government urged to act as Edinburgh chip shop caught selling deep-fried HEROIN
Health campaigners in Scotland have urged the SNP government to take immediate action after an Edinburgh chip shop was found to be selling deep-fried...
Statue of Bristol slave trading Tory MP ‘tripped and fell’ insist police
In Bristol, England, police attended a protest against police brutality, during which a more than 100 year old man who posed no threat to...
Tory Party pledges to attack pot holes now it has defeated the disabled
The Tory Party has declared victory in its war against the disabled and announced it will re-deploy its resources in a war on pot...
Hampstead Heath Glory Holes to close in respect for George Michael
Regular visitors to Hampsted Heath have been informed all glory holes will be closed from tomorrow as a mark of respect to George Michael.
A...



















































