Tooth Fairy tax fully costs Tory manifesto
Humbled by her failed election gambit Theresa May today announced a new policy to resolve the social care funding crisis which torpedoed her election...
OED to introduce new terms for despicable journalism
Following some recent "newspaper" headlines, a source at the Oxford English Dictionary has revealed some new words to be introduced to accurately describe some...
Travel Chaos Hailed as “Complete Success” by French.
French authorities today claimed that their test of the post-Brexit border checks was a complete success, with motorists in Kent delayed for hours and...
GBBO causes football fracas
It has been revealed that last night's violence at the London stadium was caused when West Ham fans chanted the name of the Bake...
Man into ‘real music’ unveils plans to spend night sneering at Eurovision
A 'real music' fan from Rochdale has revealed plans to spend tonight sneering loudly at the Eurovision song contest.
Martin Williams 42, told the Herald "Even...
Gove Demands Westminster Soft Play Area
Michael Gove MP caused elation inside Kate Hoey MP today with his demand for a soft play area at the Palace of Westminster.
Gove, the...
KKK David Duke polling better with black voters than Donald Trump
In news that feels like it should be satire but is in fact oddly true, Dr David Duke, the Grand Wizard of The Ku...
Theresa May Reads A Christmas Carol Backwards To Give It A Happy Ending
It's one of the most famous stories, if not the most famous, in the English language. It's been made into countless films, plays and...
Success of women’s sports teams coincides with an increase in cases of erectile dysfunction,...
The NHS is struggling to keep up with the increase in male erectile dysfunction which appears to coincide with the success of female sporting...
World book day sparked hate incident
An unfortunate faux pas occurred yesterday at St Timothy's primary school in Rochdale.
Gareth Brown, a year 5 pupil was sent home after arriving at school...
Picture of Dorian Gray to replace Britain in future relationship with EU
It's thought the deeper thinking behind moving the picture to the front line of negotiations over the future relationship of Britain and the EU is as a result of the government discovering just how far up a creek they've rowed already.
2016 maintains the Status Quo
2016 has been everybody's annus horibilis, and it is with great regret that we announce the death of Status Quo legend Rick Parfitt.
Having survived...
Wars of the Roses to be Re-Run
10 Downing Street has this morning announced that The Wars of the Roses are to be re-fought via a referendum for each decisive battle.
It's...
You can’t trust a man with a beard says Daily Express
Corbyn is clearly trying to turn Britain into Soviet Russia, insinuate the media today after a leaked list of ideas described as a manifesto.
“Sounds...
Particle physicists admit Hadron Collider has caused slow end of universe
It is 2 years since the upgrade and usage of the Relativistic Heavy Ion Collider (RHIC) back in Feb 2014.
Concerns were raised by non-physicists...
ISIS applies for FIFA membership
The murderous psychopathic caliphate known as ISIS has applied to join the world football governing body, FIFA.
In a surprise move, they hope to be...
