Scandinavian ‘Too Drunk To Stand’ Following Drunk-Sleighing Arrest
Rochdale magistrates heard how a visitor from Lapland, Mr Nicholas Saint (1,747) created havoc in Rochdale with his erratic control over his team of excitable reindeer pulling a bright red sleigh.
“I did not have fap relations with my work computer” says Damien Green
The beleaguered Secretary of State is still denying accusations of downloading and viewing porn like a teen with two dicks on his office computer...
999 rescue for man who misunderstood the meaning of ‘rape robot’
A dramatic and embarrassing rescue involving two fire engines and four police cars was underway this morning, after one man failed to realise his...
Government plans to lower age of criminal responsibility to 2 YEARS OLD
To help with the deficit, the government will be lowering the age of criminal responsibility to 2. The age of criminal responsibility is currently...
Men in Rural England “Shitting Themselves” as Helen Titchener Walks Free
Men up and down the UK will now be sleeping with one eye open and replacing all the knives in the house with plastic...
Nelson Mandela House in Peckham Evacuated After 20,000 Litres of Luminous Paint Found in...
Hundreds of residents of Nelson Mandela House in Peckham have been evacuated after 20,000 Litres of highly flammable, luminous yellow paint was found stockpiled...
British Patriots demand Register of Terrorists
Paul Golding has picked up the baton from Nick Griffin today in calling for a Register of Potential Terrorists.
The call comes in the wake...
Police fear French blogger killed in whipped cream accident may have topped herself
The international irony reservoir was overflowing this week as news came through that French lifestyle and fitness blogger, Becky Fromage-Burger, was slain in her...
Julian Assange plans quiet Christmas at home
Julian Assange has confirmed that he will be having a quiet Christmas at home this year.
In a telephone call Mr Assange told us,...
Expansion of stop and search powers opposed by MPs and other criminals
Leaked Home Office document shows that the high concentration of police at the entrance to Parliament could lead to unprecedented levels of stop and...
Government to cut costs by putting prisoners in charge of prisons
The Government has announced plans to cut costs by putting prisoners in charge of prisons. The announcement comes after the successful conclusion of a...
