Police call time on sex pests

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Paedophile sex pests across England and Wales are to be fitted with bells, in a new scheme announced by the police today. The new devices...

Foreigners with British citizenship MUST support England in the football, IT’S THE LAW

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A Brazilian woman and her South African friend, who have both recently attained British citizenship, have been reported to the authorities after announcing that...
Police

Amber Rudd confirms extra police will be provided from Magic Bobby Tree

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The Mayor of London, Sadiq Khan, said “The Met have deployed extra police to reassure communities especially those observing Ramadan." This is the fourth time...

Reports of widespread rioting across UK takes government by surprise

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Tonight, the U.K. Is in disarray. The major cities of London, Manchester, Liverpool, Leeds and Birmingham are in lockdown with reports of outbreaks of...

Expat Moans About EU Citizens in UK

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A British expat has hailed Parliament's rejection of EU citizens' right to stay in the UK post Brexit. Speaking from beside his swimming pool at...

Knives sharper than the tools carrying them

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Causes of knife crime confirmed to be poor choices of dead victims As knife crime continues to plague the streets of the capital, a bleeding...

Man beaten white and gold by the Police

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We at the Rochdale Herald really liked this headline but couldn't think of a way of making even slightly believable. What follows is some made...

Donald Trump signs Executive Order Banning Entry of Toddlers into USA

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After being alerted to the shockingly high number of deaths caused by toddlers shooting their parents, President Trump signed the legally binding order yesterday that prevents...
Gun held in front of American flag

Fatal logic feedback loop kills five more Americans

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America has once again been proved right as yet another mass shooting takes place in shopping mall and nobody armed inside could shoot the...

Intentional explosions totally different to terror

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After around 30 people were injured, many more shocked and people consequently feeling terrified, New York officials are keen to point out that the...

Teresa May in Dogging Scandal

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This seemed to be the headline that the Daily Mirror were fruitlessly alluding to in their article about a condom found in some woods...

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