National News

Roy Clark, a 56 year old kitchen fitter from Castleton was amazed to discover that his application for Agent of Her Majesty's Secret Service had been accepted. "I couldn't believe it" said Mr. Clarke. "My...

UKIP have elected Diane James as their new leader. Apologies for our previous article that featured Mick Jagger from The Rollong Stones. Our intern Douglas has been flogged over the mix up in traditional UKIP rough...

Diane James was elected the leader of UKIP yesterday and has already been causing controversy on account of not being Nigel Farage. People outside of UKIP greeted the news with cries of "who?" and "whatever".

A Balmoral based deer has spoken out after being run down by the heir to the British throne. Dougal Hornhead spoke to the Herald after seeking veterinary care. "Aye, I wiz jist out for a run...

GCHQ, the British spy agency that is regularly exposed for bugging our phones and nicking our online data to spy on us, has announced that it wants what is being called a Great British...

There were touching scenes at The Moderates against Moderation riot in the car park outside Rochdale's now infamous Waitrose as police and rioters came together to help a fat man out of his trousers. Steve...

In what is turning out to be a much dragged out saga of scandal after scandal from those jumped up meme thieves over at SNN comes further revelations as our offices at The Rochdale...

This could be the headline if the Houses of Parliament aren't upgraded. A one off special of the show 'Homes Under The Hammer' will be broadcast next week on the BBC, in which international investor...

In the face of a shareholder revolt, retail giant Sports Direct is to drag its working practices kicking and screaming into the 1920's.  Following a damning house of commons committee review and several exposés by...

The world waited with baited breath for David Davis' speech in which he was expected to reveal the government's plans for exiting the EU. The speech was timed to take place at the exact...

 Amber Rudd is set to give evidence to a commons committee on the state of the inquiry into child sexual abuse in place of Dame Lowell Goddard, who didn't have the balls to turn...

The 49-year-old was today offered the position at the Old Bailey after an exhaustive selection process. Police say Choudary will now have a captive audience of followers in the UK. The judge, who described Choudary...

Homeopathic politician and all-round quack-licker Jeremy The Hunt has stated that patients will suffer if planned strikes by junior doctors go ahead. "Obviously we don't have a problem with patients suffering from underfunding and our...

In a monumentous speech to the House of Commons yesterday, the Brexit Minister David Davis set out the government's plans for taking Britain out of the EU. "Almost a majority of the British voting public...

Transport for London have overstepped the mark by introducing gay traffic lights according to Rochdale father of two, Arthur Branesell. "Its outrageous! There's one with two women holding hands. How am I supposed to know...

Disgraced pornography enthusiast, first class passenger, casual sext pest and Rochdale MP Simon 'Spanker' Danczuk is said to be "absolutely buzzing" that he's not the sleaziest MP this week after Keith Vaz, the former...