NASA announce Kellyanne Conway is not of this world
NASA has announced it will hold a press conference later this week to reveal new discoveries "of significant importance, "beyond our solar system".
The agency...
KKK David Duke polling better with black voters than Donald Trump
In news that feels like it should be satire but is in fact oddly true, Dr David Duke, the Grand Wizard of The Ku...
Thank God it was a lone wolf with mental issues and not a terrorist...
More than 50 people have been killed and over 200 injured in a gun attack in Las Vegas, Nevada, today.
It has become the...
White House desperately concealing news of Twitter character increase from Trump
The twittersphere is in overdrive this morning with millions of users tweeting out their hope that the White House is able to conceal the...
Trump orders Fabergé selfie-stick for inauguration
In preparation for his inauguration ceremony, President elect Trump has commissioned Fabergé, the esteemed and historic jewellery makers to the Russian emperors, to craft...
Putin’s money was just resting in my account Trump tells James Comey
Donald Trump has dismissed as fake news any suggestion that money that has appeared in his account is anything to do with collusion with...
Waxwork of Donald Trump removed from Museum in Bumshart Nebrahoma
A full size model of Donald Trump used for "selfies" by visitors to a museum has been removed by popular demand.
Pictures shared all over...
National holiday declared as USA goes 6 days without mass shooting
This is the closest to a full week that the US has gone without a mass shooting since 'The Great Week of Peace' in...
Gun sales rise 300% ahead of Trump Inauguration
American gun sales have enjoyed a steep rise in the days leading up to the President elect's inauguration.
"It's almost 200% more than when Bush...
Oscar winning director Jonathan Demme dies aged 73
Oscar winning director Jonathan Demme has died aged 73.
Filmmaker Jonathan Demme, whose Oscar-winning thriller "The Silence of the Lambs" terrified audiences and introduced...
Trump discovers one weird trick to increasing attendance at his rallies
The White House has confirmed that Donald Trump has found a weird trick to increasing attendance at his rallies.
During a speech given to Texas...
He knew what he signed up for, says dickhead who doesn’t know what he...
Proving once and for all that sometimes the best thing to say is nothing, Donald Trump told the widow of a grieving soldier that...
If it wasn’t for these pesky bone spurs I’d have stopped shooter myself, says...
Actual real-life President of the United States Donald Trump told a press conference earlier today that if it wasn't for the debilitating bone spurs...
Turning Trump off and on again doesn’t seem to have done any good
The White House Head of IT has expressed his heightened concern that the Presidency could be heading for a critical outage.
Head of IT Maurice...
I don’t make mistakes says man who accidentally got himself elected President
A giant orange man child who accidentally got himself elected President of the United States during a publicity stunt for his gaudy golf course business announced live on television that he doesn't make mistakes, immediately before making a mistake.
Why does this keep happening, asks country selling guns without doing background checks
A country who sells weapons over the counter to anybody who wants one is stumped at how it can be home to so many...
