Donald Trump’s staff installs 400 extra red buttons to “delay the inevitable”
The fate of the billions of people could lie in the hands and minds of these two, often unpredictable leaders, which is a concern for many.
Russian-branded Emperor’s new memo wallets causing security concerns
Two mysterious Russian stationery salesmen are coming under scrutiny tonight as memo wallets they supplied to government departments may not be all they are...
Surprise! I was born in Kenya says Barack Obama
Barack Obama surprised the world today after announcing that he wasn't actually born in America after all but was actually born in Kenya, and to top it off is a Muslim.
KKK David Duke polling better with black voters than Donald Trump
In news that feels like it should be satire but is in fact oddly true, Dr David Duke, the Grand Wizard of The Ku...
Statue Of Liberty To Be Deported
America's creepiest uncle, State Department Obergruppenführer Steve 'Steve-O' Bannon confirmed today that steps were being taken to deport 'dangerous subversive' the Statue of Liberty.
"Ms...
Trump’s presidency is ‘metaphorical, not literal’, says Spicer
Following unsubstantiated wiretapping allegations, president Trump’s press secretary, Sean Spicer, has argued that Trump is the metaphorical president and leader of the free world,...
Tony Montana to become new White House communications director
Tony Montana is set to become White House communications director following the sacking of Anthony Scaramucci today.
Mr Montana was last seen toting M16A1 guns...
We need buoyancy aids not Beyonce aid, say Houston flood victims
Residents of Houston were bemused by an offer from pop star Beyonce offering help for those affected by the recent flooding.
“We asked for buoyancy...
Trump supporter accidentally extinguishes trainers with own tears
"Wild" Bill Board, an American protesting at an advert for trainers was unable to get his shoes to burn today because the tears he...
Trump trumped by top trumpeters
Six anti-Trump trumpeters who had been tunefully disrupting the presidential candidate on the campaign trail have been silenced - temporarily.
The musicians from the San...
Donald Trump ends democracy in America
I’ve decided Ivanka will come after me. I mean, she’s hot, and she has my gift with politics, so she’s the perfect choice
Robert E Lee statue replaced by bronze of obese man in pickup truck holding...
The move comes in order to calm social tensions enraged over the weekend when the savage alt-left attacked a group of peaceful demonstrators merely having a walk with some torches and flags to highlight the importance of freedom of speech.
Virginia to ban books instead of burning them
Parents from the Virginia School District have called for an immediate ban on all novels that contain the n-word.
To Kill a Mockingbird, Of Mice...
Putin’s money was just resting in my account Trump tells James Comey
Donald Trump has dismissed as fake news any suggestion that money that has appeared in his account is anything to do with collusion with...
President Trump In Deep Water Over Puerto Rico
President Donald Trump has found himself in the middle of a storm of controversy recently following his comments about Puerto Rico.
At a press...
Donald’s diddy digits dodge draft
As the smokescreen around Donald Trump's draft dodging tactics intensifies The Rochdale Herald has uncovered startling new evidence.
The story currently being spun is that...



















































