Theresa May to rebrand Conservatives as People’s Front of Judea to present united front...

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Many alternative names were considered. The United Front of Judean People. This was taken unfortunately by a group lead by David Davis and Sajid Javid. Splitters!

UK insists EU to have custody of Farage at weekends in Brexit divorce settlement

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As part of the Brexit divorce settlement the EU has agreed to have Nigel Farage at weekends. In exchange for the financial settlement, believed...

Labour conference advised “Don’t mention the Brexit, I mentioned it once but I think...

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The Labour Party Conference in Brighton attendees have been advised not to mention the Brexit. They mentioned it once, but they think they got...

Brexit Party candidate apologises for not wearing poppy on his Nazi uniform

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Brexit Party candidate Graham Cushway has been forced to issue an apology after being spotted without a Remembrance Day poppy on his Luftwaffe uniform. Mr...

Soon to be estranged husband proposes ‘transitional sexual union’

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Under the suggested terms of the deal, Britton, 34, would remain in the family home for up to a further two years, and would be entitled to avail himself of all the sexual benefits associated with a normal marriage.
Blue Passport

A blue passport is an integral part of being British, says bloke who’s never...

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The great victory that is Brexit has delivered old-style blue passport covers to the grateful people. Rejoicing Brits across the country have been applying...
Philip Hammond

Fresh sexism row after Hammond overheard telling Theresa May not to ‘worry her pretty...

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Philip Hammond was today facing another storm over his casual sexism as it was revealed that his response to the Prime Minister's concerns over...

Five Guys make creamy mess all over Nigel Farage

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A fresian of excitement has gripped Newcastle over the last few days, with the news that Nigel Farage would be visiting. The Brexit Party...
Iceberg

Massive Iceberg applies for EU membership

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In a shock development following its breakaway from Antarctica, the giant iceberg has applied for membership of the EU. A hastily formed government led by...

Theresa May outrages Japanese Prime Minister with deportation letter

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British Prime Minister Theresa May has become embroiled in a diplomatic incident while visiting Japan after personally delivering a Home Office deportation letter to...
Titanic

British shipping businesses not optimistic enough about massive iceberg heading for Atlantic say Brexit...

2
The Brexit lobby has claimed the trillion tonne iceberg heading for the Atlantic from Antarctica is a challenge to British shipping interests to put...

Heath department hails compulsory organ donation as possible way to pay for Brexit

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Sources inside the Department of Health this evening are said to be excited over the Secretary of State's alleged contribution to the debate about...
Viagra

WTO confirms nations can trade with U.K. on a ‘pity fuck’ basis.

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The WTO has confirmed that in the case of a no deal Brexit, member nations will be free to trade with the U.K. as...
Florence

Theresa May to prove in Florence it’s not just British people who don’t listen...

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The British Prime Minister is today at the EU Summit in Florence to give a landmark speech to a 4,000 seat amphitheatre containing one...
For Sale Signs

London in crisis as Brexit threatens to make house prices affordable

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One of the many mysteries wrapped up inside the "Brexit means Brexit" enigma has been revealed. To the overwhelming delight of the capital's aspirational...

London celebrates first “Gammon Pride” event

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Scotland Yard and the Met Police are bracing for potential violent clashes at a "Gammon Pride" event being held in London today. The event will...

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