Britain happy to be America’s toilet after Brexit and doesn’t fear a blockage
Dr Liam Fox is in America this week offering the United Kingdom up as America’s toilet, after Brexit, and sees no risk of a...
Ringmaster May’s Brexit circus will tour till 2021 unless David Davis gets eaten
It was announced last Friday that Ringmaster may’s Brexit circus will attempt to extend its world record breaking tour of Europe until 2021 unless...
Labour leader confirms that he has a plan to break the country as well...
Jeremy Corbyn has closed this year’s Labour conference with a rousing speech to his Corbynista fans explaining his plans for an entirely fictitious and...
Party with nothing to hide announce plan to close Serious Fraud Office
Conservative plans to abolish the Serious Fraud Office has absolutely nothing to do with the investigations into rich Conservative supporters,said a spokesgrunt for the...
A Christmas Carol reimagined by new Ministry of Truth to promote thrift
The iconic Christmas tale has been edited by the new government department to 'instill a sense of fiscal caution' in the nation's youth.
The new...
Bear Cancels Plan To Shit In Woods
Bryan Pickle, an unemployed brown bear, interrupted a meeting at The National History Museum this morning to make a surprise announcement.
"I've been thinking about...
Owen Smith has beaten off 1,200 young boys – says Owen Smith
Owen Smith has caused another Labour controversy in parliament after beating off hundreds of boys in an attempt to pull his wife.
Mr. Smith told...
Rochdale woman not ready to tell friends she’s “OK thanks, bbz”
A Rochdale woman today refused to confirm whether she was alright or not, following a passive aggressive cry for attention on Facebook.
The woman, 32...
The Big Fat Secret Santa Appeal Update – 3,373 gifts worth £27,173.08
The Big Fat Secret Santa appeal we're running with NewsThump, Southend News Network, Angry People in Local Papers and Tuckered is really gathering steam...
Young people should not be ignored says old man ignoring young people
Jeremy Corbyn sought to reconnect with young people today over Brexit by sacking the last of the Remainers in the Shadow Cabinet for suggesting...
Mr Tumble denounces Theresa May and says not in our name.
Leading clowns have issued a joint statement confirming that Theresa May's latest attacks on migrants and the NHS are not part of traditional clown...
Talking Turkey; Leadsom Embroiled In Referendum U-Turn Debacle
Conservative leadership candidate hopeful Andrea Leadsom was remaining tight lipped this morning following revelations that she has 'pulled a u-ey' over the recent referendum...
Nobody could have done better than Corbyn, says Nobody
Nobody, who is the shadow secretary of state for Northern Ireland, claimed today that, had he been Labour leader, Labour could have won the...
Stubborn turd refuses to flush
A massive turd that is blocking the downstairs bog next to the Cabinet Meeting Room in Downing Street has been studiously ignoring hints that...
Banks Punish Entrepreneurs For Brexit
Our Finance and Business correspondent, Scott Zsalt, was livid today after failing to get support from a major bank due to the fallout from...
Corbyn Sits Down for the Working Class…..Again…..
Spending a football match without a seat, crushed up against other supporters in the stand, or crouched uncomfortably in the gangway is an all-too-absolutely-never-happens...
