Pope meets Bono to demand he removes U2’s albums from his iTunes account
Pope Francis is to have a private audience with Bono to demand to know how to delete U2's latest album from his iTunes library.
According...
UN tells Goodwill Ambassador to fuck off
After a record low of zero days in the job, the new UN Ambassador, whose job it would've been to generally spread love and...
Trump’s Wall to be Made Out of Thoughts and Prayers
The latest twist in the ongoing farcical shitshow that is the US President's attempt to build an completely pointless wall simply because he said...
Trump vows to chisel four ‘losers’ off Mount Rushmore
President Trump has vowed to have the images of four of his predecessors chiselled off Mount Rushmore, describing them as ‘total losers’.
In a...
All options on table including surprise missile attack on Tuesday, Trump tells Syria on...
Actual real-life president of the United States of America Donald Trump has tweeted that Russia and Syria should get smart and expect a surprise...
Trump leads Independence day celebrations by honouring Goldblum and Smith
It's the 4th of July national holiday, the anniversary of Independence day in the United States of America. A day when the patriotic celebrate...
President Trump to ‘grab May by the pussy’
Donald Trump may touch the UK prime minister's vagina in their first private meeting, the president has tweeted.
The straw-haired misogynist wrote, "Excited to meet...
Trump ends feud with North Korea after golf resort deal agreed
The world has been glued to the news whenever Donald Trump makes an announcement regarding the bitter rivalry with North Korea.
As we have...
Mass shootings ‘fact of life’ says only country where mass shootings happen
Ralph H. Ick, head of the Texas branch of the NRA made the shocking statement yesterday after seven children were slain and three were...
Mike Pence unhappy ‘in transition’
Vice-President elect Mike Pence is expected to ask Donald Trump to move him to another area after becoming unhappy as part of the incoming Republican’s transition...
G20 Crisis as Trump eats hot dogs in Hamburg.
President Donald Trump caused outrage in Hamburg, Germany today, eating hot dogs and apple pie and drinking root beer all flown in with him...
Trump demands resignation of Dow Jones
White House sources reveal alleged serial sex offender, proven serial failed businessman and currently failing POTUS Donald J Trump has called for the head...
UKIP leader calls for Theresa May to resign
UKIP's leader, Vladimir Putin has called on Theresa May to call a General Election to ensure a Government is elected that will push Brexit...
2017 set to be hottest year on record
Experts in worldwide trends are predicting that 2017 will reach terminal levels of warmth by mid-June.
Professor Thorfin Nerfstretcherrsson, Head of Rochdale Community University's department...
Katie Hopkins killed and eaten by starving migrants
Mail Online columnist Katie Hopkins' plan to drown migrants attempting to cross the Mediterranean to prevent them coming to the UK has been put...
Trump and Steve Bannon to wrestle naked for alt-right leadership
It has emerged that President Donald Trump and Breitbart Chief Steve Bannon have apparently arranged to wrestle naked on the White House South Lawn...
