Heavily armed men in masks carrying clubs burn homes in Northern France
A large group of heavily armed men carrying clubs and guns attacked and burned the homes of several thousand people in Northern France yesterday...
Am I Mexican? Ask Trump voters after he says USA will pay for Wall
The recently announced decision that the wall between Mexico and the USA will be built using American taxpayers money under a piece of legislation...
All guns to be armed with guns
In the wake of the latest mass shooting of innocent people to take place on U.S. soil, the National Rifle Association has issued a...
Everybody is an expert all of a sudden, complains Norn Iron
Unusual moment of unity sweeps province.
“Yous, yous only gives a shite if it affects yous,” a spokeswoman said today. “Unless something happens on the...
Angela Merkel to meet Theresa May to tell her to fuck off in person
Following historic meetings with world leaders such as Carwyn Jones and Nicola Sturgeon during her first week as British Prime Minister Theresa is set...
‘What happened on Alderaan was terrible but I condemn the violence done by all...
Obi Wan Kenobi, under pressure from Yoda and other members of the ghost Jedi Council to condemn the destruction of Alderaan, has issued a...
American lawmakers to submerge Donald Trump in barrel of water to see if he...
It was announced today via The USA news site that Donald Trump will be immersed in a barrel of water to see if he...
Mike Pence attends Broadway musical by mistake
Vice-President elect Mike Pence was roundly booed after he attended a performance of Broadway musical ‘Hamilton’ entirely by accident.
UKIP corruption proves EU corruption say UKIP
Documents leaked to Sky News showing that, should results be confirmed, UKIP have been misappropriating EU cash prove that the EU is dodgy, claimed...
Scandal as Trump attempts to circumvent physical laws
In his bid to become master of the universe, Donald Trump has postulated a new set of axioms about the physical universe as we...
Da Vinci’s ‘My Spunky Pantaloons’ sells for £45m
A previously unknown Leonardo da Vinci work "My Spunky Pantaloons" has been bought bought by Charles Saatchi for £45m.
The jizzy kecks will be...
Leave campaigner forced to abandon argument after forgetting what Brexit means
Panic today as vocal anti-EU campaigner, Dennis Pigwater, forgot a crucial piece of his argument during an online debate.
Dennis, 58, from Rochdale, was engaged...
Donald Trump to present Steve Bannon with participation medal for service to America
“Bannon great American. Cant find greater. So great. Greater than Kennedy. Kennedy loser. Got shot. Only losers get shot. Couldnt even drive own car. Bannon deserve medal for participation at White Hoise! Turned up every day even when I didn't!”
People attending reading of Hefner’s last will only doing so for the articles
Various well known public figures, and nobodies, have announced today they intend to be at the reading of Hugh Hefner’s last will and testament,...
British Tomahawks Launched As Part Of U.S. Strike Hit Aledo
It has been revealed that as part of Donald Trump's assault on Syria, two British missiles were launched. These missiles were said to be...
Kim Jong Un can’t dance, that brother ain’t got no Seoul
“Kim Jong Un? He can’t dance, that brother ain’t got no Seoul. You know I put the rump into Trump babycakes. When I slut drop you know it’s going to be fire and fury on the dance floor.”


















































