Bands line up to celebrate Trump’s impeachment

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The Rochdale Herald can exclusively reveal the star studded line up already in place for celebrating the impeachment of Donald Trump, expected to take...
Prisoner

Rochdale man released from US prison after Trump repeals ‘Merry Christmas’ ban

0
A Rochdale couple have told the Herald that their son's release from jail in America is the best present they could have hoped for. Percy...

Trump sues porn star for breaching confidentiality agreement about affair he claims not to...

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Lawyers for the actual President of the United States of America are seeking $20 million in damages from a porn star who he says...

Theresa May summons devil to discuss Syria

The prime minister has summoned the devil to discuss the government's response to a suspected chemical weapons attack in Syria. They are expected to discuss...
Belgian Beer

Belgian brewers threaten budget busting Brexit blackmail beer price boost

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The world’s biggest beer company, Belgium based Anheuser-Busch Inbev warned Monday that the drop in value of Sterling in the wake of the UK's...

Am I Mexican? Ask Trump voters after he says USA will pay for Wall

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The recently announced decision that the wall between Mexico and the USA will be built using American taxpayers money under a piece of legislation...
Playboy Mansion

RSPCA desperately seeking forever homes for 45 bunnies rescued from ‘Bunny Farm’ in California

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A RSPCA spokesman in Nantwich is urgently looking for 45 'new residents rescued from what he described as 'the biggest bunny farm they had...

Over-exaggerating totally different to lying your arse off

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Swimmer and US gold medal winning bullshitter, Ryan Lochte, has sort of apologised for making things up. The lying git said that his description of...

I’m nothing like Steve Bannon – says Darth Vader

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Darth Vader took to Twitter today to distance himself from "that evil bastard" Steve Bannon after Bannon compared himself to Darth Vader, Thomas Cromwell, Dick Cheney and Satan.
Top Secret

Russian-branded Emperor’s new memo wallets causing security concerns

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Two mysterious Russian stationery salesmen are coming under scrutiny tonight as memo wallets they supplied to government departments may not be all they are...

CIA to dumb down intelligence briefings

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The U.S. Director of National Intelligence (DNI) Dan Coats, announced on Sunday that they will be cutting down the president’s daily intelligence briefings to a maximum...
Trump in a barrel

American lawmakers to submerge Donald Trump in barrel of water to see if he...

8
It was announced today via The USA news site that Donald Trump will be immersed in a barrel of water to see if he...
Ivanka Trump

Donald Trump’s penis not bigger than Kim Jong Un’s, confirms Ivanka Trump

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Sources close to the President have confirmed that Donald Trump's willy is not bigger than Kim Jong Un's. It is being reported around the world...
Pauline Hanson

Australian MPs vote unanimously to make burka compulsory for Pauline Hanson

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Former chip shop owner Hanson later complained that the decision proved conclusively the unwarranted discrimination faced by women wearing Islamic garb in Australia and vowed that she would fight tooth and nail to ensure they enjoyed the same rights as other Australian women just as soon as she'd finished fighting to have them all deported.

Australia in early fireworks embarrassment

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We have heard news that fireworks have been sighted a full 12 hours before new year in Syndney Harbour, Australia. The fireworks that were reported to...

Trump disappointed Agrabah is nothing like it is in the movie

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The POTUS sent a series of Tweets earlier about his visit to Saudi Arabia, after securing a $110 billion arms deal. The leader of the notoriously...

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