White House Nativity

Official White House Nativity scene to feature baby Jesus with Trump’s face

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The first image of the official White House nativity scene has been released, and it is already causing quite a stir. Every character in the...
Good Friday Agreement

Good Friday Agreement to be replaced by Stupid Friday Agreement

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The Good Friday agreement of 1998 has been replaced by the Stupid Friday Agreement of 2017. Prime Minister Theresa Mayhem has asked Northern Irish Democratic...
Cave Diver

Rescue divers call off search for viable Customs Union Plan

Rescue divers searching for a viable plan for a customs union palatable to lunatic backbench MPs have finally called off the search. Having plumbed the...
Prisoner

Rochdale man released from US prison after Trump repeals ‘Merry Christmas’ ban

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A Rochdale couple have told the Herald that their son's release from jail in America is the best present they could have hoped for. Percy...

Theresa May summons devil to discuss Syria

The prime minister has summoned the devil to discuss the government's response to a suspected chemical weapons attack in Syria. They are expected to discuss...
Red and green nebula

Trump Election Due To Cosmic Emissions Says Brian Cox

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Professor Brian Cox has explained the recent election of Donald Trump by pointing to a rare stellar phenomenon. The Oldham-but-not-Rochdale born scientist explained:- "On the 9th...

The NRA are a bunch of arseholes and each and every one of them...

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But ma guns. A survey in 2013 found that the United States had 88.9 firearms for every 100 people. More than Yemen, Mexico, Pakistan and...

DUP ask Merkel for one billion Euros to give her their support in Bundestag

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News broke this morning that the Northern Ireland political party, the DUP, has demanded one billion euros from Angela Merkel in order to support...

Trump rage over #takeafinger protests

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Donald Trump has demanded "they fire these sons of bitches" over the growing #takeafinger protests. A woman pictured raising her middle finger toward Trump's motorcade...

Macron makes mince meat of May

Emmanuel Macron has a well deserved reputation as a man who knows what an older lady likes. Now it seems he's out to shag Brexit...

Russian spies were visiting world famous Dutch ski resorts

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A group of alleged Russian spies who were apprehended in Holland have said they were there learning to ski on the world famous Dutch...

Leave campaigner forced to abandon argument after forgetting what Brexit means

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Panic today as vocal anti-EU campaigner, Dennis Pigwater, forgot a crucial piece of his argument during an online debate. Dennis, 58, from Rochdale, was engaged...
Justice

Britain plans Brexit trade deal ‘perverts for peace’

Following the embarrassment of the spectacular failure of a hideously expensive program to rehabilitate sex offenders, Ministry of Justice officials are arranging study visits...
Scared Office Worker

Stop calling people cocks you dick, White House HR Department tells Anthony Scaramucci

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The White House HR Department has asked their latest recruit Anthony Scaramucci, the new White House Communications Director, to please, please, please stop calling...
Theresa May

Theresa May’s Rituals

"Theresa May is signalling distress." Dr. Maca Damia comments, viewing photos of the Prime Minister kneeling by the road just inside Wales. "Do you see...
Donald Trump female

Mayor of New Orleans accidentally summons Donald Trump after saying ‘Hurricane’ five times

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Mitch Landrieu, the Mayor of New Orleans has told has told us that he inadvertently summoned Donald Trump to New Orleans. The Mayor said, "I...

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