Statue Of Liberty To Be Deported
America's creepiest uncle, State Department Obergruppenführer Steve 'Steve-O' Bannon confirmed today that steps were being taken to deport 'dangerous subversive' the Statue of Liberty.
"Ms...
Governor of Puerto Rico seeks Theresa May’s advice on how to rule an island...
The Governor of Puerto Rico, Jorge Aliouet sent an urgent appeal to Prime Minotaur Theresa May tonight.
The island of Puerto Rico has been devastated...
Julian Assange plans quiet Christmas at home
Julian Assange has confirmed that he will be having a quiet Christmas at home this year.
In a telephone call Mr Assange told us,...
Atos and DWP pronounce Trump unfit for work
A physical and mental health Atos assessment on US President, Donald J Trump, has conclusively found that he is unfit for work, the DWP...
Terrorists ‘disappointed’ to be rewarded with 72 vegans in heaven
Typographical error blamed for afterlife reward mix-up
The five jihadists involved in last Saturday's Spanish terror attack have expressed 'disappointment' upon receiving the heavenly reward...
North Korea fury after Trump sends dick pic following Kim Kardashian meeting
North Korean media has reacted angrily after Donald Trump allegedly sent Kim Jong Un a photo of his genitalia.
Spokesman for North Korea, Ban-Ki-Han-Ki said,...
Reality TV to blame for increase in number of f*cknuggets being elected president, say...
Reality TV is to blame for the number of imbeciles and ding-a-lings who are being elected president of the United States, video games have...
Oh,For f*ck’s Sake Most Commonly Used Phrase Of 2016
Oh, for fuck’s sake said everyone this morning, following reports of more people dying at the hands of total arseholes.
After news broke of the...
Massive weapon condemns massive weapon’s massive weapon test
A massive weapon took to social media this morning to condemn the massive weapon test of another massive weapon.
It's unclear at this point who...
Breaking: The person trespassing on the White House has been revealed as Nigel Farage
A spokesperson for White House Security has just confirmed that the intruder apprehended today was Nigel Farage.
Mr. Farage was promptly arrested after scaling the...
Trump supporter accidentally extinguishes trainers with own tears
"Wild" Bill Board, an American protesting at an advert for trainers was unable to get his shoes to burn today because the tears he...
Liam Fox Seeks Trade Deal With ISIS
International Trade Secretary Liam Fox will fly into Iraq later today in the hope of securing a trade deal with the so-called 'Islamic State'.
Fox...
Trump condemns dead soldier for not standing during national anthem
President Donald Trump has rebuked allegations of inappropriate comments made by the grieving widow of a US soldier today by pointing out her husband...
EU offers bribe of better UK weather if we remain
The European Union, desperate for the UK to remain, have said that the proposed European Standard Weather system due to come into operation early...
Good Friday Agreement to be replaced by Stupid Friday Agreement
The Good Friday agreement of 1998 has been replaced by the Stupid Friday Agreement of 2017.
Prime Minister Theresa Mayhem has asked Northern Irish Democratic...
Condoms are a commie liberal plot to give everybody AIDS according to Trump VP
Revelations of comments made by Donald Trump's running mate, the 'Caucasian Executioner of Indiana', Mike Pence show that Governor Pence might not know how...
