Boris Johnson books flight home from New York with Thomas Cook

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Downing Street have issued a statement this morning explaining that Boris Johnson won't be able to attend Prime Minister's Questions today because he's stuck...

This Generation of British Bulldogs could be the last

2
In an astonishing move by the Kennel Club, the standards committee has released a press statement saying that if Britain decides to stay within...

Goldie melts down OBE to replace pawned gold tooth

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DJ and alleged actor, Goldie, has vowed to melt down his MBE under the guise of moral outrage about some club somewhere closing down. The...
Football

Donald Trump congratulates Rochdale AFC on winning Superbowl

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POTATUS, Donald Trump telephoned and congratulated Rochdale AFC on winning the Superbowl on Sunday night. Much to the surprise of club officials. A club spokesman...
Trump Family KKK Photograph

Trump Family KKK Photo Scandal

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There was outrage across America as a family photo of the Trump family emerged with both Donald Trump's father and mother dressed from head...

Daily Mail editor on suicide watch as rumours of Mo Farah knighthood circulate

31
There are genuine fears for the editor of The Daily Mail after a Somali born Muslim Immigrant ran to a double double victory at...

5000 American tourists arrested for ‘hostile reconnaissance’.

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The Metropolitan Police Hostile Reconnaissance Unit has arrested more than 5,000 American tourists in the last two days.

Daily Mail Exposed as a False Newspaper

3
Jonathan Harmswoth, 4th Viscount of Rothermere, controlling shareholder and current chairman of the Daily Mail has finally come clean and admitted that the newspaper...
Michael Gove

Michael Gove concedes sushi made from poisonous blowfish should be made by an expert

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Michael Gove, the man who claimed Britain had “had enough of experts” would appear to have at least some time for them, at least...

Paul Nutall announces he’s going to be the next Doctor

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Early last week news broke that Peter Capaldi will stepping down from the iconic role after this year's Christmas special. Speculation has been rife as...

Editor of satirical Newspaper “not convinced” readers know what satire means

11
The editor of a satirical newspaper was reported to have his head in his hands after 60,000 people read an article he'd written about...

Lost Amazon Tribe found really fit and well

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Startling news reached us today that a lost tribe of warehouse workers has been found "really fit" and well in an Amazon 'fulfilment centre'...

Pound Pinches Parisian Patterning – Press and Paparazzi Perplexed

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Scandal hits the UK economy once again as the new £1 coin (GBP) is accused of fashion plagiarism by the Continental Euro (EUR). Speaking via Text...
Lord Sugar from The Apprentice

All contestants to win The Apprentice this year

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The BBC has forced Sir Alan Sugar to allow everyone in the current series of The Apprentice to be given a job in the...

Royal Doulton to produce commemorative Alex Salmond Toby Jug 

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The iconic British pottery company which was established in 1815 made the announcement yesterday. Managing Director, Timothy Clay, said; "Toby Jugs were always a popular item...
Donald Trump

Lord Lucan, Pol Pot, Martin Borman ,Abu Bakr al-Baghdadi and Boko Haram emerge from...

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An entire top shelf of global mass murderers have signalled they plan to emerge from hiding following the announcement by US president Donald trump...

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