If we can pay for food we can pay for rockets – say NASA
American space go-getters NASA are said to be up in arms about budget restrictions while there is still enough money available to feed some children 3 meals a day.
"We're never going to put a...
May May trigger Brexit in May? Maybe
Theresa May today revealed her plans and a slogan for Brexit; a bitter, lonely and incontinent future with seventeen cats and no continent.
The slogan was widely accepted as an accurate reflection of how life...
Fatboy runs away from the Ball
The worlds biggest celebrity couple, Ball and Slim, have sadly announced they are to divorce after 18 years of party-hard marriage.
Nearly okay to kill elephants again
As we take in the wonderful news of the large increase in the number of elephants across the south of Africa, Zimbabwe has called for the legalization of the ivory trade.
Zimbabwe, famous for its...
Corbyn goes 39 under par beats Kim Jong il’s record
Jeremy Corbyn has announced his decision to retire from Golf after taking it up yesterday and shooting a record breaking 39 under par at the Belfry during his very first game.
The round included a...
Trump Family KKK Photo Scandal
There was outrage across America as a family photo of the Trump family emerged with both Donald Trump's father and mother dressed from head to toe in KKK robes.
The Ku Klux Klan were quick...
London Motorists furious that cyclists lives might be saved
London drivers are currently outraged at London mayor Sadiq Khan's plans to reduce cyclists deaths.
"Over half of cyclist deaths in the capital involve construction type trucks with high cabs and large wheels and very...
Shock News: Tyson Fury Tests Positive For Horlicks
The Rochdale Herald can exclusively reveal Tyson Fury was declared medically unfit to fight because he tested positive for Horlicks.
The IBF have banned Horlicks, a known performance reducing beverage for a number of years now.
It is...
Prince William fingers Kate in back of hatchback in Rochdale
A sticker showing Prince William and The Duchess of Cambridge along with a depiction of two fingers raised in a V sign has caused some consternation in Rochdale.
The sticker appeared in the back window...
British Public shocked to learn Pizza and San Miguel not Mediterranean Diet
Rochdalians are being reminded today that having a deep pan 16 inch spicy meat special doesn't count as following a Mediterranean diet- even if you've preceded it with 12 bottles of San Miguel.
The reminder...
An analysis of the situation regarding the shooting down of MH17
The West: Well, Russia. What do have to say for yourself?
Russia: Vot? I don't know vot you are talking about.
The West: That missile! We investigated and found out it was a Russian missile,...
Teresa May to trigger Brexit after finding Shergar
Teresa May has finally announced her cabinet's decisive plan to trigger article 50 reminding Brexit voters that it is still "on her to do list" and insists she "hasn't forgotten about it."
The plan involves...
Apple to move to Battersea iStation
Apple have announced this week that they will be basing their future British tax evasion projects at South London's Battersea Power Station.
Mayor Sadiq Khan welcomed the move from the tech giant and said that...
IRS look forward to “getting to the bottom” of Trump’s Federal Income Tax “I’m...
Surgical glove manufacturer Sphinctoraw Inc got a surprise order for 110,000 pairs of elbow length surgical gloves from the IRS.
The order was placed about three minutes after Donald Trump said he paid no...
Trump rushed to John Hopkins with severe burns
Donald Trump is said to be in a stable but critical condition this morning after being rushed to hospital suffering from self inflicted third degree burns to almost half of his body.
Fact checking website...
Waterloo Road Grandma School Farce
A crisis has arisen in a Rochdale school after a Chinese whispers cock up of epic proportions went much further than any sane person could imagine.
Not wanting to be left behind Rochdale Council jumped...
