Trump administration to ban 1984 and burn Fahrenheit 451

14
The United States Federal Communications Commission (FCC) will be confiscating all copies of George Orwell’s novel 1984 and burning all copies of Ray Bradbury’s Fahrenheit 451,...

Poll reveals public wants good old fashioned political sex scandal

0
A Herald survey reveals that public perception of politicians lean towards disappointment at them not having any juicy sex scandals anymore.  Carried out at the...

Politicians human too. Balls!

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Speaking on the Jeremy Vine show on BBC Radio 2 this afternoon, Strictly Come Dancer Ed Balls made the outrageous claim that politicians are...

Johnny Foreigner can zip it on Brexit

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The government has banned foreigners from advising on Brexit. No really. The government has really banned advice on Brexit from non-British people. That's not even satire. What the...

Grenfell Tower survivors offer Michael Gove their last five pounds to bugger off

6
Survivors of the Grenfell Tower disaster suffered a further shock last night when esteemed Tory minister Michael Gove was spotted in the vicinity. It's believed...
Boris Johnson

Brexit is actually really hard confirm millionaires who stand to inherit everything but brains

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The Rochdale Herald has been briefed by a group of hardcore Brexit Conservative MPs who have confirmed that Brexit is actually really hard, even...

Great repeal bill to herald the return of Spangles

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The government's planned "Great Repeal Bill" to change 44 years worth of EU legislation into British law is slated to help turn the clock...

Gove clarifies that Government will extend the term non-sentient to include any living being...

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In a desperate bid to look like the Tories are not using Brexit as an excuse to bring back fox hunting, cock fighting, prima...

I said ‘sack my cook & hold my calls’ says MP accused of sexual...

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Embattled Tory MP Mark Garnier claims he was simply misunderstood by his Secretary over recent sex abuse allegations that have rocked Westminster. Barnier, a...

Gavin Williamson declares war on schools

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Former Defence Secretary, Gavin Williamson has declared war on schools mere hours after being appointed Education Secretary. His secret plan, which he immediately leaked, is...
We're all going to die

We’re all going to die after Brexit, confirms Philip Hammond

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Remain voters around the country are said to be absolutely furious to learn that every single person who voted to remain in the European...
TRUMP POLE DANCERS

Trump hails Polish culture saying “Pole dancers are the best, I’m a huge fan,...

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US President Donald Trump Thursday attempted to cement US-Polish relations in a speech delivered in the Polish capital Warsaw on the first day of...

Theresa May to headline Latitude Festival

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Not to be outdone by Corbyn's appearance at Glastonbury last weekend, May hastily forms new band to perform at Latitude this July. In the kind...
Noel Edmunds

Noel Edmunds to head up Brexit negotiations armed with 28 red boxes

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Failed entertainer and minister for Brexit, David Davis, will take centre stage in a Deal or No Deal special to be aired on Dave...

David Cameron In Shock After Key Attack On Shed

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A member of the radical far left group Momentum is in custody this evening after apprehension following keying of the paintwork on David Cameron's...

Trump wears tinfoil hat to stop Obama hearing his thoughts…

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President Donald J. Trump has come up with an ingenious solution to prevent Obama from ‘spying on his thoughts’. He now wears a tinfoil...

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