Theresa May ready to deny TV debate ever took place
The BBC and ITV are to defy Conservative Party wishes and air live debates between participating parties before the upcoming June election.
An inside source...
Britain invokes Dunkirk spirit of ‘running away’ as EC takes back control of Brexit.
Theresa May escaped from Brussels late last night, as a small flotilla of fishing boats each carried a tiny morsel of her shattered credibility...
Trump joins Time Magazine “Person of the Year” club
In a move in keeping with the utter shit show that has been 2016, Time Magazine has named the orange baboon Donald Trump "Person...
Mr Tumble denounces Theresa May and says not in our name.
Leading clowns have issued a joint statement confirming that Theresa May's latest attacks on migrants and the NHS are not part of traditional clown...
Henry Bolton Declares vote of No Confidence in UKIP
UKIP leader Henry Bolton has declared a unilateral vote of no confidence in UKIP. Bolton has spoken out tonight, claiming that he wants to...
Government’s Brexit staff all writing “Trekking in Nepal” on CV’s
Recruitment agencies report an influx of fresh CV's today all listing activity from late summer last year until today as "Trekking in Nepal".
All the...
Labour to campaign for Liberal Democrats in June 8th General Election
Diane Abbott was resurrected this afternoon to speak to a journalist of sorts, on the BBC.
Ms Abbott used one of her last possible...
Companies forced to list massively racist employees
British companies are to be made to publish lists of how many employees are nasty and racist, under new plans announced by home secretary...
Only 23 days to save historic Christmas Deal, warn turkeys
Turkeys have declared that today there are only 23 days to save their historic Christmas deal.
They have warned that is vitally important that the...
Boris Johnson shocked to discover British Empire no longer contains Canada
Foreign Office officials have confirmed that Boris Johnson has finally accepted that the British Empire no longer contains Canada, more than a year after...
Blair and Branson to form New Virgin Labour
An email leaked to the Independent has revealed that billionaire Lord Sir Baron Richard Branson (MBE OBE BFD) is to bankroll Lord Sir Tony...
Government announces above-inflation pay rise for vital frontline MPs
Chancellor Philip Hammond responds to calls to offer above-inflation pay rises to public sector workers in Westminster, after a survey revealed that four out...
Opinions of Entitled Marxist Bedwetters No Longer Valued says LSE
Social Science lecturers from the LSE were told they would not be asked to contribute to government work and analysis on Brexit.
Reading the Daily Mail causes cancer of the soul
Following sickening reports of yet another moron mowing down innocent pedestrians, the Daily Mail has excelled itself by implying that the victims were to...
Labour MPs win right for toilet break during final vote on Brexit deal
After a tense round of debating in the house of commons Labour MPs succeeded in forcing through an amendment to the Brexit bill which...
Leaked Conservative manifesto just 5 pages of “lets get Brexit done” written in Russian
With less than 3 weeks until the nation once again goes back to the polls, the Rochdale Herald has managed to obtain a leaked...
