Boris not offensive, simply misunderstood – insists Boris

2
Posh fop-headed press gob and Foreign Secretary Boris Johnson has defended the countless insults and faux pas he has made by claiming that each...

Burger King announce 126oz Presidential Milkshake for Trump visit

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Popular scarfing establishment Burger King has announced a new super-sized 126 ounce milkshake, to be released on Jun 2nd in time for the visit...

It’s not my fault there aren’t enough Marxists to win a by election insists...

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Following Labour's disastrous defeat in The Copeland by-election Jeremy Corbyn has responded to criticisms of his leadership of The Labour Party by assuring everybody it has nothing to do with his politics or his leadership.

David Davis chosen as Westminster village idiot from competitive field

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Secretary of State for Exiting the European Union, David Davis, has been chosen to hold the esteemed job of Westminster Village Idiot, beating off...

Heath department hails compulsory organ donation as possible way to pay for Brexit

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Sources inside the Department of Health this evening are said to be excited over the Secretary of State's alleged contribution to the debate about...

Party planner faces cleaning bill after pile of elephant dung left in conference hall

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Organisers of a widely publicised public party found themselves faced with a giant cleaning bill this morning after owners of the venue they partied...
TRUMP POLE DANCERS

Trump hails Polish culture saying “Pole dancers are the best, I’m a huge fan,...

9
US President Donald Trump Thursday attempted to cement US-Polish relations in a speech delivered in the Polish capital Warsaw on the first day of...
Boris Johnson

Keep me out of the news says BoJo

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A BBC news anchor disappeared in a cloud of bitter irony recently whilst reporting the story surrounding the Foreign Secretary’s reported texts asking to...
Danczuk

Simon Danczuk wins Prestigious most Tory Tweet Award 2017 Le Chatte d’Or

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Simon Danczuk has won the 2017 most Tory Tweet Award after taking to Twitter to complain about homeless beggars in Rochdale today.

Trudeau Promises Canadian Citizens A Wall. ‘U.S. Will Pay’

2
Canadian Premier Justin Trudeau reacted to the news of Donald Trump's election as US President by announcing plans for a wall to be built...

Specsavers Official Sponsors Of WWIII

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Specsavers has announced it has signed a two-year deal as official sponsors of the forthcoming World War Three, with effect from mid November. The company...

Trump rushed to John Hopkins with severe burns

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Donald Trump is said to be in a stable but critical condition this morning after being rushed to hospital suffering from self inflicted third...
Boris the Clown

Boris resigns to spend more time in storm drain beckoning to children

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Boris Johnson has resigned from his position as foreign secretary today, and has returned to his natural role as a malevolent entity which preys...

Modern slavery greatest evil, says woman who supports unemployed working for free

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Theresa May has announced that the worst thing in the world, after Trump's hair and Boris Johnson's gob, is modern slavery. Millions will...

Boris Johnson shocked to discover British Empire no longer contains Canada

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Foreign Office officials have confirmed that Boris Johnson has finally accepted that the British Empire no longer contains Canada, more than a year after...

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