TM + DUP 4EVA carved into Magic Money tree by PM

4
Theresa May spent the afternoon hand in hand with Arlene Foster and the rest of the Democratic Unionist Party skipping through Hyde park stopping...
Hot dog

G20 Crisis as Trump eats hot dogs in Hamburg.

2
President Donald Trump caused outrage in Hamburg, Germany today, eating hot dogs and apple pie and drinking root beer all flown in with him...

UK Benefits to be given to EVERY citizen of the Commonwealth due to admin...

0
The government recently updated its IT infrastructure with shocking consequences potentially costing the UK economy billions. The glitch will see the 2.1 billion members of...
Boris Johnson

Boris Johnson says ‘Get behind May’ as it’s best angle to knife her in...

15
FOREIGN SECRETARY Boris Johnson has urged colleagues to "get behind" the PM because "it's difficult to stab people in the back when you are...
Scientist

Not all Tories are twats, but all twats are Tories, scientists discover

46
Scientists have discovered that not all Tories are twats, but all twats are Tories. We all know that Michael Gove is a twat. Even his...
Rees Mogg

Jacob Rees-Mogg descended from German immigrants genieologists confirm

0
Plans by eccentric far right conservative politician Jacob Rees-Mogg to be elected leader of the Conservative party have been delivered a body blow as...
T20

Cricketers injured as dyslexic Anarchists riot at T20

9
Two Yorkshire cricketers and a number of spectators were injured last night as nearly 200 dyslexic anarchists rioted at the T20. Similar riots took place...

Dianne Abbott assures voters she’s feeling better after taking a Paracetamol

0
Dianne Abbott, the MP for Stoke Newington and The Shadow Secretary for Health, has assured both parliament and her constituents that she has almost completely recovered from having a bit of a headache.

Corbyn Backs May In Commons Vote Again

0
"I'm sure I can remember one, if you just give me a minute." Jeremy Corbyn replied this afternoon, following the Commons vote to call...

Public outcry as politician caught out telling the truth

0
Big news in the world of politics today where the Mayor of Rushcliffe has been lambasted for not lying.  Christine Jeffreys, Mayor of Rushcliffe...

Whole UK Economy resting on single PPI claim

0
After the referendum on leaving the EU the treasury scrambled quickly to try and formulate a plan.  "No one actually thought the plebs would defy...

Theresa May Fumbles For Pin For Grenade She Shoved Up Her Ass

0
Theresa May is reported to be surrounded by a Bomb Disposal Unit this evening after the discovery of an unexploded grenade inside her ass. The...

London sewer found clogged with dreams of the young after government flushes future down...

17
Sewer workers in the London area of Whitechapel have reportedly found the dreams of the young decomposing in a giant blockage in the system...
The Daily Mail

Reading the Daily Mail causes cancer of the soul

9
Following sickening reports of yet another moron mowing down innocent pedestrians, the Daily Mail has excelled itself by implying that the victims were to...
Theresa May

Kaiser Chiefs hurriedly rerelease ‘I Predict a Riot’

3
As crowds of surprisingly calm protesters gather at Westminister to demand the resignation of the recently elected droid, Maybot 2.0, The Kaiser Chiefs are...
Westminster

Voters must provide family coat of arms as ID insists government

0
The government has been accused of the suppression of voters' rights after plans to introduce compulsory checks of a family coat of arms for...

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