Having cake and eating it disappointment intensifies
A group of Rochdale toddlers are stamping their feet and crying after they were told that they cannot have their cake and eat it.
The...
Davis to seek pinky promise with Barnier over customs arrangements post Brexit
David Davis offered reassurance today to business leaders worried about customs arrangements post Brexit by declaring he would seek a pinky promise with Michel...
“Leave scientists” confused by spoon
Leave the EU scientists found themselves stumped this afternoon when faced with a spoon.
They had previously been asked to identify a knife and a...
Immortan Joe assures War Boys Post-Apocalyptic Desert Dystopia less chaotic than Brexit
Gas Town will not be "plunged into a Brexit style world borrowed from dystopian fiction" after the nuclear winter, Immortan Joe has said today.
Britons to get easy sex after Brexit as the whole world lines up to...
Good news on the prospects with Brexit this afternoon as news broke that the entire world is lining up to provide easy sex for...
Labour conference advised “Don’t mention the Brexit, I mentioned it once but I think...
The Labour Party Conference in Brighton attendees have been advised not to mention the Brexit. They mentioned it once, but they think they got...
Clocks won’t go back this month due to EU ruling
The European Union and the UK Government have agreed that the UK's clocks won't go back an hour in October this year or change...
Symbolic figurehead has dinner with elected European leaders
The symbolic figurehead of the United Kingdom, Theresa May, dined last night with the twenty seven elected heads of the European Union.
Ms May was...
Brexit means Brexit means Brexit means Brexit confirms EU Brexit negotiator
"It's taken us a week to work out just how clever you Brits are," said negotiator Hans Upp. "We thought it was just a...
We can just eat cats, dogs and harvest organ meat from the poor if...
British farmers would just start rounding up household pets for meat in the event of the UK leaving the EU without a trade deal,...
Statistics confirm three kinds of lies; lies, damned lies and Boris Johnson’s statistics
UK Statistics Authority have reaffirmed the old adage today that there are three kinds of lies: lies, damned lies and Boris Johnson’s use of...
EU to offer May reproduction of Munch’s The Scream to hang in 10 Downing...
The woman who believes she is British Prime Minister is to travel to Florence tomorrow to give a one date stand up performance in...
Theresa May to rebrand Conservatives as People’s Front of Judea to present united front...
Many alternative names were considered. The United Front of Judean People. This was taken unfortunately by a group lead by David Davis and Sajid Javid. Splitters!
Britain happy to be America’s toilet after Brexit and doesn’t fear a blockage
Dr Liam Fox is in America this week offering the United Kingdom up as America’s toilet, after Brexit, and sees no risk of a...
Man overseeing poorly equipped chaotic withdrawal from Europe describes Dunkirk film as inspiration
One of Britain's chief Brexit negotiators has been saying how the film, Dunkirk has inspired him in his negotiations for Brexit.
Cliff Edge told the...
Brexit talks in crisis after Michel Barnier unfriends David Davis on Facebook
The UK's negotiations with the EU hit a stumbling block today, after it emerged that Michel Barnier has unfriended David Davis on Facebook.
Brexit secretary...
