Britain leaves E.U. in last night’s dress and no tights
At 6.30 this morning, Britain hailed a taxi while attempting to wipe off the worst of last night's make-up, confident in the knowledge that...
Davis to seek pinky promise with Barnier over customs arrangements post Brexit
David Davis offered reassurance today to business leaders worried about customs arrangements post Brexit by declaring he would seek a pinky promise with Michel...
Warnings issued magic mushroom Brexit brexitius causes hallucinations of £350M week for NHS
Health officials in the United Kingdom issued warnings today regarding the consumption of a new species of magic mushroom called ‘Brexit brexitius’ as consumers...
Remainers lead campaign to remove warning labels from household chemicals and rerun Brexit referendum
It's been revealed that remainers are leading a campaign to remove warning labels from household chemicals. It's believed that this is part of their...
Boris Johnson says he was baked when he made cake and eat it brexit...
Foreign to the truth Secretary Boris Johnson has attempted to evade responsibility for the calamity that Brexit has become by allegedly claiming he was...
Brexit is actually really hard confirm millionaires who stand to inherit everything but brains
The Rochdale Herald has been briefed by a group of hardcore Brexit Conservative MPs who have confirmed that Brexit is actually really hard, even...
Corbyn sacks last of Shadow Cabinet who didn’t resign last year
In a shock move Friday Labour Leader Jeremy Corbyn sacked all of his shadow ministers who didn't resign last year in protest at his...
Britain invokes Dunkirk spirit of ‘running away’ as EC takes back control of Brexit.
Theresa May escaped from Brussels late last night, as a small flotilla of fishing boats each carried a tiny morsel of her shattered credibility...
University of life grads outraged over EU threats of further education
Graduates of the world famous British University of Life expressed their outrage this morning after top Eurocrat tyrant Mickie “the barb” Barnier threatened them...
London celebrates first “Gammon Pride” event
Scotland Yard and the Met Police are bracing for potential violent clashes at a "Gammon Pride" event being held in London today.
The event will...
We’re not racist we want fewer white Polish faces too, Brexiters tell Vince...
Brexiters have taken umbrage at Vince Cable's suggestion that they'd like to see more white faces.
Cliff Edge, a red man who normally speaks in...
David Davis reveals he’s accidentally been attending PTA meetings in Brussels and has no...
There were refreshing bursts of honesty in the ritual Brexit update today when David Davis revealed he’s only just worked out he’s been attending...
Jeremy Corbyn demands General Election so voters can choose between Brexit or Brexit
Jeremy Corbyn has demanded that the Government call a General Election in order that the public can choose between his insane version of Brexit...
Dacre overjoyed as Khan hints at Brexit backdown
There are reports of loud and frenzied whooping sounds coming from the office of Daily Mail editor Paul Dacre this afternoon at the news...
Brexit means Brexit means Brexit means Brexit confirms EU Brexit negotiator
"It's taken us a week to work out just how clever you Brits are," said negotiator Hans Upp. "We thought it was just a...
Cornwall in Crisis as more middle class hippies leaving than arriving since Brexit
Cornwall is in crisis as studies show, for the first time in a generation, more middle-class old hippies are leaving than arriving.
One local, Anni...
