Theresa May to prove in Florence it’s not just British people who don’t listen...
The British Prime Minister is today at the EU Summit in Florence to give a landmark speech to a 4,000 seat amphitheatre containing one...
Full blown Brexit testing on monkeys halted after everything in lab just f*cking died
David Davis, lead researcher in the government's secretive Brexit Lab, has announced that Brexit testing on monkeys has been halted after everything in the...
London celebrates first “Gammon Pride” event
Scotland Yard and the Met Police are bracing for potential violent clashes at a "Gammon Pride" event being held in London today.
The event will...
Brexit means Brexit means Brexit means Brexit confirms EU Brexit negotiator
"It's taken us a week to work out just how clever you Brits are," said negotiator Hans Upp. "We thought it was just a...
City of Brighton & Hove to be shortened by 1 metre after Brexit
Residents of Brighton & Hove were shocked to discover plans to shorten their city by 1 metre along it's East/West axis following Brexit.
In 1972,...
Disastrous mistake warns stopping Brexit would be disastrous mistake
A disastrous mistake will warn derailing Brexit will be a disastrous mistake in a speech about a falling over in public later today.
In a...
May to leave dinner middle of main course and refuse to say what she’ll...
Downing Street has rushed to reassure an anxious British public today that the prime minister will leave her dinner with EU counterparts this evening...
Brexit bias uncovered in Westminster
After detailed research, leading academics have revealed a list of staunchly pro Brexit MPs and have demanded that the old, rich white people in...
Man who claims he will talk to anyone to solve problems refuses to talk...
A man who often says that you should meet your opponents and discuss problems and issues with them to find a solution has refused...
Passports to be made in France as British firm De La Rue ruled out...
Home Office confirms Franco-Dutch firm Gemalto will make Bleu passports.
Controversy struck the UK this week after a mix up at the Home Office led...
Now that passports are blue again I might get one, says 50 year old...
A fifty year old racist fuckwit has told The Rochdale Herald that he is over the moon that passports are now going to be...
Three Tenors worth only £17.93 after Brexit
Outraged music lovers everywhere have been devastated by the news that Brexit will cause the Three Tenors to be devalued to £17.93.
Observers have noted...
Brexit a Fucking Shambles, Says John Major
Former Prime Minister and voice of reason John Major has confirmed in a speech that the ongoing government brexit negotiations are a fucking shambles.
Major,...
Chequers agreement shreds itself
Michel Barnier has revealed that the sole copy of the latest version of the Chequers agreement shredded itself in his office yesterday.
"I popped out...
Heath department hails compulsory organ donation as possible way to pay for Brexit
Sources inside the Department of Health this evening are said to be excited over the Secretary of State's alleged contribution to the debate about...
Remain campaigners thwarted by import shortage of “I Told You So”s
Anti-Brexit campaigners are suffering from a shortage of "I Told You So"s, as "Project Fear" rapidly swings into "Operation I Told You So", as...
