Your sometimes weekly horoscopes…

0
Here are this week's horoscopes. Or are they next week's? Meh. It's all nonsense anyway... Aries Sometimes you might think people are out to get you. They are, you are being stalked and should be very,...

Weekly Horoscopes With Olivia Astro – 1.8.16/7.8.16

0
Apologies for missing last week, but nothing interesting happened in your pathetic lives anyway. And I knew it wouldn't, so I felt I deserved some time off. Anyway, I'm sick of giving my powers...
Mariah Carey

The Rochdale Herald Christmas countdown – Number 3 – Mariah Carey records shock cover...

0
So here we are. We've reached the top three in our countdown of the ten most popular articles of 2017. Written by the mysterious Galatian, an ancient Roman soothsayer who sends his messages through time...

This week’s Roboscopes with Mystic Rob. What does this week have in store?

0
Mystic Rob brings you your Roboscopes for the week ahead Aries - The hair in the plughole. On friday you will be confronted with a very difficult problem. The problem is so difficult that you...
Jacob Rees Mogg

Scary brexiteer “Mogo” revealed to be a hoax

0
Jacob Rees-Mogg,known to the internet as "Mogo",the scary haunted Victorian doll,has been revealed to be a hoax. Pictures of Mogo have been popping up on various political media, with...
Aunty Angela

Aunty Angela’s Agony Corner

0
Dear Aunty Angela, I think my husband is cheating on me. We've been married for 15 years. He works in advertising and his job requires him to be away from home a lot. I'm a...

The Rochdale Herald Christmas Top Ten – Number 2 – Prince Philip deemed fit...

0
At number two in our countdown of the most popular articles of 2017 is the second offering from our resident vegetable highwayman, Dick Turnip, to hit the top ten. Originally published on the 5th of...
horoscopes

HorrorScopes

4
Aries - The Dead Postman Things are looking up for you this week. You break your neck in a car crash on Wednesday. You will be in traction for months. Your lucky thing is the ceiling. Taurus...

Racists shocked to learn that there are more than two religions

The revelation that there are more religions than just Christianity and Islam has caused mass outbreaks of shock and confusion among racists everywhere, it has been revealed. The existence of other religions such as Buddhism,...
Aunty Angela

Aunty Angela’s Agony Corner

0
Dear Aunty Angela, I think my husband is cheating on me. We've been married for 15 years. He works in advertising and his job requires him to be away from home a lot. I'm a...

Weekly Horoscopes With Olivia Astro – 4.7.16/10.7.16

0
Aries Beware people driving silver Vauxhaul Vectras early in the week - they mean you harm and will go out of their way to inflict serious injuries upon your person. Strike first if you can...

Couple thrilled by second baby have no understanding of its intentions yet

1
A couple thrilled by the safe arrival of their second baby have no idea of its intentions yet. Nic and Cassie Novella already have a three year old daughter called Allopecia. They have been 'managing...
Francis Underwood

The Rochdale Herald Christmas Top Ten – Number 5 Fictional President held to higher...

0
Taking fifth place in our countdown of 2017's most popular articles is this biting piece of social commentary from Johnny Wapping, the only dog we have on our staff. The Punning Pooch of...

Editorial – A light in the dark for stroke survivors

0
Here at The Rochdale Herald we support several charities. One of those charities is Different Strokes the UK charity for younger stroke survivors. Today sees the launch of Different Strokes’ Light In The Dark campaign...

Weekly Horoscopes With Olivia Astro – 27.6.16/3.7.16

Aries The fall in the value of the pound is just the beginning of your financial woes this week - your pension provider will collapse, leaving you with nothing for your old age. You...

Follow us

61,683FansLike
29,631FollowersFollow
23,610FollowersFollow

Popular Posts