Rochdale Feel Good Festival to be Re-Named Feel Alright

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The once popular Rochdale Feel Good Festival is to be rebranded as 'The Rochdale Feel Alright Festival' in a shock last minute announcement by...
Trump

Donald Trump fails to mention the length of his penis in speech defending western...

9
Donald Trump left an eager crowd shocked in Poland today when he failed to mention the length of his schlong once during a rousing...

Trump says he didn’t sexually assault 3.52 billion other women

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Bewigged bouffant buffoon, Donald J. Trump, an actual potential president, made the claim at his latest rally. The tiny handed eater of souls came under...

Doctor Who goes back to Gallifrey after announcing ‘I give up’

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The protector of earth with more faces than Big Ben made the announcement on The One Show on Friday. Reflecting on the past 50 year of...

Clocks won’t go back this month due to EU ruling

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The European Union and the UK Government have agreed that the UK's clocks won't go back an hour in October this year or change...

Trump finds Rory McIlroy’s head in bed after throwing Koch off Golf Course

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President-Elect Donald Trump has denied evicting the proper billionaire, libertarian gun nut and political financier behind the Tea Party, David Koch, from his exclusive...

Johnson replaces Cabinet with the Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse

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Boris Johnson committed himself to leading Britain into 'a new chapter' yesterday. Downing Street sources revealed that the chapter referred to by the tousled...

Satirist suspects people just reading his headlines 

31
An angry satirist is convinced that people are just reading the headlines of his articles and maybe the first sentence underneath. "Anything after that could...

Rothschilds ‘surprised’ at Trump victory but pleased in investment in US wall building company

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The Rothschild family are set for a huge windfall following Donald Trump's 'surprise' success in the US election.
man with money

Wonga provide financial aid package as Britain’s credit rating reduced

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Payday loan provider Wonga has announced today that it has offered to step in and help the government. The move follows a further reduction...
Rees Mogg

Jacob Rees-Mogg late for PMQ’s because he couldn’t find anywhere to park his horse.

18
Jacob Rees-Mogg apologised to the Prime Minster today, after arriving late for the PMQ’s at Westminster. Running over 25 minutes late; Rees-Mogg blamed the lack...
corbyn

Labour manifesto to revolutionise politics by getting rid of the Labour party

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The Labour Party has revealed a manifesto that will revolutionise British politics by getting rid of the Labour Party. Speaking to the Herald a spokesman...

Rose Gold for afternoon strolls

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After a 112 year wait to prove how good we are at walking slowly around a park Britain's Justin Rose yesterday casually sealed gold...

Farron u-turns and joins coalition after McDonnell says he’ll let him sip his beer

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"A coalition? No absolutely not we will not do it" said Tim Farron, earlier today at the Westminster bar. However, moments later the Liberal Democrat...
Overweight

Government isn’t spending enough on health, says chain-smoking binge-drinker who doesn’t go to gym

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An overweight chain-smoking binge-drinker who never does any exercise has confirmed that this government isn't spending enough money on ensuring that his health care...
Brexit Bus

Increased racism was on the other bus say Brexiteers

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Brexiteers have been quick to point out that a post-Brexit vote increase in racism was on the other bus. Government clown Boris Johnson said, "This...

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