Other News

Rochdale Crown Court today saw the conclusion of the now infamous "Scatter Cushion Slaying" case. The accused, Abraham Smith (54), from the Sink Estate pleaded guilty to stabbing his wife of 22 years 67 times...

Nigel Farage's successor will be announced at UKIP's Bournemouth conference tomorrow but a party insider has let slip that his replacement will be Nigel Farage. "It's going to be Nigel" said Arthur Brane, Chairman of...

Red headed billionaire Christopher Evans has been confirmed as the new host of the Beeb's brand new baking show designed to take the place of their previous smash hit since losing the rights to...

Heavily trapped shoulders shrugged a sigh of relief today as justice was served to a rogue Crossfitter who failed to tell every single person he ever encountered that he does Crossfit. Steven Night, who lists...

Facebook was in chaos today after the soaring popularity of the Spell Check a Racist (S.C.A.R.) page caused a stack overflow causing the entire network to grind to a halt. "Sadly, we had no choice...

GCHQ, the British spy agency that is regularly exposed for bugging our phones and nicking our online data to spy on us, has announced that it wants what is being called a Great British...

A prestigious national industry award has been won by local letting agents Fyre, Trappe and Hassel.   The British Association of Letting Agencies awarded the firm their much sought after "Services to innovative bastardry" award...

Edward Snowden, the famous whistle-blower and internet freedom campaigner, has angered unelected PM Theresa May (or May not but she's not going to give a running commentary.) He compared the privacy hating Tory to Darth...

The Presidential frontrunners cybernetic 'human suit' momentarily glitched at the recent 911 memorial service at ground zero yesterday, the third time this has happened on the campaign trail in the last two months. The cold...

With the news that The Great British Bake-Off is to move to Channel 4, host and national treasure Mary Berry has announced her retirement from television. The national treasure told the Herald today; "I've had a...

Love productions, the company behind mindless dirge The Great British Bake Off, has said its show will no longer appear on the BBC after this series. "It's not about the size of the cheque," said...

Local high fat enthusiast and walking cardiac arrest Wayne Bucket who inexplicably made it to the finals of Great British Menu, has been voted off the show.  The show pits the country's top chefs against...

Lord Reginald Foxhunter-Shandy said: "It's the biggest boundary shake up since the last one". The plans unveiled today will see Jeremy Corbyn lose his Islington North seat which is going to be given to either...

Ex Prime Minister David Cameron has today announced he will quit his role as an MP, which has surprised almost everybody as we'd all thought he had fucked off months ago. Cameron, who is most...

The secretive state of North Korea has managed to cure most illnesses from the common cold to cancer, it has been revealed. Ishit Yu Not, a 33-year-old North Korean doctor with a gun to his...

During a performance in Derbyshire last night Miranda Hart fell over and no one laughed. "It just wasn't funny" said super fan Ewan King who attended the show. "Usually when she falls over I'm in...