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Liam Callaghan

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analogue

Government digital service actually still analogue

The government’s “digital service”, a branch of the cabinet office and the one that was meant to protect the government’s computer systems against cyber...
Queen and Philip

Prince Philip disappointed not to get his own sparkly hat

The Duke of Edinburgh’s retirement is entirely down to one thing, it would seem. Speculation has been rife ever since the announcement, but now...
Paul Nuttall

Paul Nuttall To Become Next Duke Of Edinburgh

Paul Nuttall will be assuming the position of Duke of Edinburgh, following the retirement of Prince Philip, he has confirmed. “It’s the perfect job, really,”...

Nobody Sufficiently Into Ed Sheeran To Be Fussed About Being First In The Arena

Ed Sheeran - like him or dislike him, it seems that nobody has particularly strong feelings about him either way, it would appear. At a...
Calendar

Government Announces National Nothing Day.

From worthy issues such as International Women’s Day to cultural stereotypes like National Tea Day, it seems like every day is "something" Day. Just...
Popularity Contest

It’s not a popularity contest, really unpopular MP tells voters

An extremely unpopular MP has just informed voters that the upcoming general election is not a popularity contest. The MP addressed the crowd and urged...

All Future Covers Of David Bowie Hit To Be Recorded As Life On Titan

The David Bowie hit Life On Mars is getting a slight posthumous makeover, it would appear. In response to NASA’s announcement about the possibility of...
Jeremy Hunt

Jeremy Hunt Pictures Issued To Stop People Choking

A new cure has been unveiled by the NHS to stop people choking - looking at pictures of Jeremy Hunt. This seemingly controversial move actually...

Yoga All About Getting Your Head Up Your Own Fundament

It’s always been said that there’s more to yoga than the lotus position, but it has been revealed recently that the true aim is...
May and Cameron

Theresa May Attempting To Make David Cameron Look Better In Retrospect

Theresa May’s goal as Prime Minister is to ensure that people don’t remember David Cameron’s premiership as the worst in history, it has emerged. Speaking...

Judd Trump To Change Name By Deed Poll

Snooker player Judd Trump has announced that he is to change his name by deed poll following a series of incidents whereby people saw...

Man Flu Worse Than AIDS Cancer And Ebola Combined Say Scientists

We've all heard of the dreaded Man Flu in our time, but a team of scientists in Rochdale have finally catalogued the full effects. “The...

New American National Anthem Unveiled As ‘Donald Donald Uber Alles’

The United States is getting a new national anthem, it has been announced. An executive order has been signed replacing the old anthem, The...

America To Be Renamed Trumptopia

Donald Trump has announced a new step in his plan to make America great again - he's renaming it after himself. In a press conference,...

Satire Is Officially Obsolete, Satirists Announce

Satirists have officially announced that satire is no more, it has been confirmed. A spokesman on behalf of satirists, announced, "As of January 31st 2017,...
angry man

Swearing Increasing Exponentially Since Trump’s Inauguration

Use of swear words has increased dramatically since Donald Trump’s inauguration, a study has shown. Since the 20th of January, the average number of swear...

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