Rochdale Socialist Worker Party member and activist, Quentin Lennon, was celebrating today after finding out that he is part of the biggest political party in the UK.
Quentin, who you may have seen in the town centre on Saturdays shouting “Getcha Socialist Worker! Smash the Tories! Wanna buy a paper?” and trying not to sound posh, was astounded:
“I couldn’t believe it!” he said, “We’ve been pulling every trick in the book for decades to make our membership look bigger: getting people to join the Anti-Nazi League without telling them that they’re counted in SWP figures, counting those figures twice, signing up random people in the street who’ve not achieved even trade-union level consciousness! If we’d only known how many people are secret Trotskyists we’d not have bothered cheating!”
Unemployed graduate Quentin heard the news from the Guardian Newspaper where it is stated everyday that everybody who supports Jeremy Corbyn is a Trotsky loving SWP member.
“I honestly thought they were Labour Party members and other ordinary people who just happened to not support a nuclear defence system that can vaporize kids and wouldn’t defend us from naff all anyway! Turns out they’re all revolutionaries like me and my comrade Derek!”
After buying a paper- which appeared to have come straight out of the pages of 1984- we left Quentin to celebrate getting one step closer to seizing the means of production with half a pint of mild.
