Katie Hopkins has been spotted in the bathroom section of Homebase today, after being forced to find a conventional way to dispose of her excrement.
Despite several years of various media outlets offering her extravagant platforms from which to void her bowels, Mrs Hopkins has finally been removed from her squatting position at LBC after going “full Nazi.”
A parade in honour of the service she has performed over the years is to be held in Trafalgar Square this evening. People are requested to dress as Lord Haw-Haw to show solidarity with Katie.
Katie’s handful of fans have taken to social media to show their solidarity and offer their own ears as a direct receptacle for her “truth-lumps.”
Katie has requested her supporters bring their own paper however, revealing “I just create the truth. I don’t deal with the consequences.”
Given she has finally been fired for penning poisoned prose, this is not entirely truthful, but in keeping with every other thing Hopkins has ever said.
Two minutes silence will be observed today during Katie’s normal broadcast hours, but only so people can fully appreciate her absence from the airwaves. It is acceptable to play dancing music instead, and jive, if that is your preference.
