Religious rights activists have launched coordinated raids around the world this morning and have successfully freed tens of thousands of battery farmed Jesuses from cages in barns.
The Jesuses who are farmed for the chocolate eggs they lay have been forced to live in cramped cages in which they couldn’t stand.
“These poor little Jesuses have been living in horrible conditions, all so that we can eat cheap chocolate eggs at Easter.” Olivia Flowerpower from PETA told The Rochdale Herald.
“If you understood the conditions that these little Jesuses had been living in so that you could eat cheap chocolate eggs you’d immediately switch to free range confectionary.”
“These Jesuses are often laying as many three or four chocolate eggs a day and never get to see daylight.”
“We know the true meaning of Easter is something to do with rabbits and chocolate eggs, but you shouldn’t forget the plight of barn reared Jesuses when you’re choosing what kind of egg to buy.”