Headlining the, new, ITV Spring schedule is the hit series, Burnley’s Got Talent, hosted by one of the Ant and Dec twins.

Described by the producers, as a laugh a minute romp through the minds of the self-deluded and by others as exploitation of those ‘soft in the head’ this latest ‘reality’ based tv show is sure to sell advertising.

Mike Righteous, the Executive Producer, explained “The idea came to me when I realised a disproportionate number of the truly hopeless freaks and loons, in the opening episodes of Britain’s Got Talent, came from Burnley. My production team did a bit of Googling and we realised we had enough material to run this series for years.”

He went on to add “Whilst there are tuneless singers, unfunny comedians and actors who can’t remember lines, it’s the speciality acts who steal the show. This year’s show features Brian who can sign his own name, Giles who is Burnley’s only Tory, Cortnee who qualified for a mortgage and Kyle, who can do up his own shoes. After the mid-season break we will be treated to Troy the window licker, and Kyle’s brother Kyle who has trained a dog to run away from him.”

It’s the dream of all the contestants that winning BGT will bring fame, fortune and a way out of their sad pathetic lives. It’s true many of the contestants will become internet stars, the opportunity to become the Brand Ambassador for the Burnley Pie Co is a big incentive. One of the Kyle’s downplayed this aspect, saying “Nah mate, just want to be on the telly.”

Responding to criticism that this type of television is exploitative, holds those less fortunate up to public ridicule and panders to the worst aspects of the human condition Mike Righteous said “Bloody Southern Do-Gooders, always sticking their oar in. We’re just giving people what they think they want. Don’t forget this type of tv helps many average people feel better about themselves, by allowing them to laugh at the obviously deluded.”

Mike Righteous went on to add, “For those taking part, it can offer a way out of Burnley and the promise of a brighter and better life. On top of that, look at the advertising revenue it generates, my offshore accounts don’t fund themselves you know.”

The new series airs on Saturday evening at 6.30