Foreign to the truth Secretary Boris Johnson has attempted to evade responsibility for the calamity that Brexit has become by allegedly claiming he was under the influence every time he spoke on the subject in the referendum campaign.
“I was well baked bruv,” Mr Johnson said, speaking to reporters in Romania, who he hoped would not be able to understand what he was saying, seeing as some were foreign chaps.
“You know what it’s like brother. You pick up a bag of hydro Brexit and the rest is history,”
While these statements are only being received by the Herald secondhand from someone who was at the scene in Bucharest, and whose emails we happened to find printed out and left on a train, our Political Forensics Lab suspect they may be credible. Perhaps. But do you own research.
If Mr Johnson has been under the influence since he decided to throw his lot in with Farage and the other serial chancers of the Leave campaign, he’s not doing as good a job of evading responsibility. Presumably because he needs the attention.
“Cake means cake only when it’s space cake, you get me?” Mr Johnson continued, apparently.
“You don’t waste good bullshit by baking it into a cake man, when you can just roll up and say whatever you think the credulous will inhale as you fill the room with hot air and smoke. You get me?”
Asked for comment Donald Tusk said he believed Mr Johnson went wrong when he decided to hang out with Farage and inhaled.
