UKIP, the party whose sole purpose was to foster the UK public to vote to leave the EU- which happened despite them- is apparently in chaos after three people that nobody has ever heard of resigned from the party.
The people, who we won’t bother to name because it would mean looking them up again and we’ve already forgotten what they’re called twice, were protesting after a bloke that nobody had heard of until last week was barred from standing as a leadership candidate on a technicality. The technicality being that he didn’t apply on time.
“It’s madness to apply rules to somebody we want to vote for!” said one of the people you’ve never heard of.
We asked a local Rochdalian Kipper for his views and he, Darren Arsworthy, said “It’s disgusting that the bloke who lied about having convictions should be barred for not doing what you’re supposed to do! He should be barred for being a darkie!”
Coverage of the resignations is set to cover the rest of the week’s news schedules so that all the important stuff doesn’t get noticed.
