It has been announced that veteran Hollywood actor Samuel L. Jackson will play Donald Trump in a biopic scheduled to be released in late 2019.
The movie, provisionally titled “Oh shit, we’re fucked”, will focus on Trump’s successful 2015-16 bid to become President of the United States.
Jackson told a Hollywood press conference that he is “proud and honoured” to have the chance to play “such a towering political figure – a man defined by his wit, his charity and his basic decency”.
At this point Jackson and most of the journalists in attendance burst into raucous laughter and a 10 minute break had to be taken to allow composure to be regained.
When the conference resumed Jackson moved swiftly to address the elephant in the room, admitting that “in one crucial respect I don’t look much like Trump”. However he expressed confidence that he would be able to find a decent wig shop, and as a result “that won’t be an issue”.
In addition to Jackson as Trump a number of other casting choices have been announced. Trump’s wife Melania will be played by Mexican actress Salma Hayek whilst conservative Christian Vice-President Mike Pence will be played by moralistic comedian Russell Brand. Vladimir Putin will be played by Hollywood tough guy Jesse Eisenberg whilst Hillary Clinton has agreed to play herself on the basis that she’s prepared to do just about anything for cash.
The movie, which is being directed by Oscar nominee Guilermo del Toro, is expected to hit theatres in December 2019.
That is if the gang of narcissistic nutjobs who currently rule the world haven’t managed to end human civilisation by this date.
