Plans to ban the enforced necking of dirty pints for under 16s rugby players have been widely criticised.
The ruling by HSE is thought to have followed on from the proposed banning of tackling at junior rugby level but it has provoked outrage among those in the private education sector.
Bracken Leas School for Boys has been leading the calls for the ban to be repealed. The Headmaster, Lord Rupert Farquharson-Campbell had this to say:
“What? Eh? What? Dirty pints? Well Churchill will be rolling in his grave. I mean banning tackling is one thing but taking away such a fine institute as the dirty pint. That is quite another, young man. The boys are devastated, beside themselves with sorrow. This is what happens when you let a woman run the country. The sooner they get that Johnson fellow in, the sooner we can all get back to the great traditions that built this country, like dirty pints and pederasty!”
Experts claim that dirty pints have been responsible for a growth in binge rugby songs and open debagging. Some of the worst hit areas have been Stowe and Eton. Local residents have been extremely distressed by the scenes. Geraldine Bird describes the scene:
“Ooo, there were loads of them all coming down from the school with no trousers on. They were singing about someone called Sally Tucker and let me tell you they were not being complimentary. I could clearly see two or three pints and they looked really, very dirty.”
It’s clear that the banning of dirty pints is welcomed in some quarters. It is believed that Jacob Rees-Mogg is looking for a way to blame the EU or the gays but that has not been confirmed.
Government officials are yet to comment on what is clearly a divisive issue.
