Theresa May is said to be thrilled this morning to have won the all party “Person Most Surprised Theresa May is still Prime Minister Award” for the seventh week running.
The award has been presented every Thursday since June 8th and Theresa has beaten off stiff odds, including Michael Gove, Boris Johnson and David Davis to retain the award.
The trophy is a statue which stands three feet tall and was donated by Tracey Emin depicting a middle aged woman, on all fours being ravished by twenty seven French bulldogs whilst eating a turd sandwich.
The plinth is made from reclaimed pieces of the upturned Hull of the Herald of Free Enterprise, the Cross Channel Ferry that capsized in the harbour at Zeebrugge in 1987 killing 193 passengers and crew.
“Obviously if you’re going to make a piece called ‘Brexit’ you have to use pieces of salvage from the worst thing to happen in the channel in recent memory. Until now.” Tracey told The Herald.
A spokesman for Downing Street released a statement saying “obviously Theresa is delighted to have won the award but obviously still surprised that despite her best efforts she has been unable to offload the responsibility for negotiating Brexit to some other unsuspecting patsy.”
Theresa is a shoe in for the race to secure the Award again next Thursday.
