Britain has become embroiled in an unexpected diplomatic farrago as ITV2’s ‘Love Island’ draws to a dramatic close with Argentina demanding the return of the island.
The problem appears to have started with a surprise video message by Foreign Secretary Boris
Johnson broadcast in ‘The Beach Hut’ this morning.
In the video the Foreign Secretary urged the remaining contestants to show the ‘Argies what for and leave so much evidence of British love on the island that it will remain forever a part of England’.
This message didn’t confuse the contestants who took Johnson’s broadcast as a history lesson and spent the rest of the morning largely chatting about how ‘wisdom arrives unexpectedly’ rather than shagging like bunnies like they are supposed to.
‘Love Island’ being filmed in Mallorca in Spain, concerns initially centred around what response the Spanish government would make to Mr Johnson’s shocking broadcast, but it was from the other side of the planet that the diplomatic broadside would be returned.
Senor Santiago Isla, Argentina’s Foreign Secretary, was the one to respond, issuing a reiterated demand for the Malvinas and adding, you can throw in Love Island into the bargain you clowns or we’re going to do you so hard at the WTO from April 1st 2019 you won’t know which is your ‘el culo’ and which is your ‘el codo’.
It was at this stage that Spain became involved, but to the dismay of Downing Street they have sided with Argentina and granted dual sovereignty of Mallorca to the South American nation, just to wind up the British.
As a result the remaining contestants have been evicted from the island and the final sequences being broadcast this evening were actually filmed in the same aircraft hanger used to mock up the long discredited moon landings by the Apollo astronauts.
