UKIP leader Paul Nuttall has caused outrage today by Issuing a call for a ban on dwarves and “midgets and really just anyone suspiciously short.”
He justified his call by stating that “What’s the matter with the midgets? Why won’t they look a man in the eye? If you can’t look someone in the eyes than you’re hiding something. Sorry. But the time for being politically correct is over.”
When it was pointed out to Mr Nuttall that people affected by height limiting conditions are born that way and it is ridiculous to attempt to ban them, he was unrepentant.
“In the old days dwarves used to play sport, didn’t they? Football and such. Perform in the circus. I reckon we could find a canon right now and shoot any dwarf who refuses to look me square in the eye into a net.”
At his request calls have gone out for a cannon, but the dimensions are definitely larger than what would be needed to shoot a short person sky high. Perhaps big enough for a taller, balding chap.
“I’m not apologising for saying what needs be said.” Paul continued. “Once UKIP have more MPs after the election I will be standing up in Westminster and demanding an immediate ban on people entering the UK from Lilliput.”
