The leaders of some of Britain’s major grouse shoots have reported that children’s birthday party bookings are up 100%.
Hubert Chomlomoley-Wearnear told us, “Normally at this time of year we’re taking bookings from people whose family tree is a straight line. However, we’ve seen a sudden surge in bookings for kids parties. It’s great for them. It will get them out of the house and learning about nature. Plus, with no deal Brexit, the skills of pray hunting will be invaluable. Our game keepers are also excellent teachers of Chemistry as well. Kids will be taught the best poison for killing Red Kites.”
Bill Board told us, “My daughter wanted a Frozen party at our house. But we looked into it and she wants to invite her whole class. Obviously, we can’t do that at home but we can take her grouse shooting. The shoot leader has an Elsa tweed suit and will sing, ‘Let it go’ to the dog as it carries a dead grouse in its mouth.”
And it’s not just children’s birthday parties. A local grouse shoot told us, “There’s 8000 people booked to come to our moor on Saturday night. Not sure they’ll be any good though. It’ll be dark when they get here and the sound system theyre bringing will scare all the grouse away.”
Parents are being warned about the dangers of accidentally introducing their kids to Prince Andrew at grouse shoots though.