Jacob Rees-Mogg apologised to the Prime Minster today, after arriving late for the PMQ’s at Westminster.
Running over 25 minutes late; Rees-Mogg blamed the lack of hitching posts and parking places for his horse as the reason for his tardiness.
Although his apology was accepted by Teresa May, the North East Somerset MP and part time Antichrist went on to comment on the unacceptable conditions in which he has to work under in the capital.
“I just don’t understand how in this day and age that there are not enough posts for horses and servant boys to back it in for you, then take your cape, walking cane and top hat.”
Rees-Mogg, who confessed that he is not a ‘modern man’ finally parked lengthways across two disabled bays, then in frustration whipped a homeless person before calling for police to lock them up for being poor.
He went on to align his views with fellow antiquated Christian, Glen Hoddle. “I don’t see why the disabled are allowed these privileges, being able to park so close to the entrance. They’ve obviously committed a most horrendous sin in a past life.”
Rees-Mogg was clearly incited when the Rochdale Herald asked him whether he approved of Jazz music and women in trousers under any circumstances.
“If my nanny wasn’t too busy changing my children’s nappies, followed by mine after Parliament, I would send her over to give you a good old biffing!”
This was not reported to the police, as this was seen a comedy gold, rather than a threat.
Rees-Mogg has been under fire recently for his comments on gay marriage and abortion. However he is no newcomer to controversy.
In 2013 he was guest of honour at a dinner held by the right-wing ‘Traditional Britain Group’. At the dinner he allegedly spoke to the leadership of forming a new political party.
Rees-Mogg wanted to guarantee two horses for every Englishman’s stable, electricity to reach Somerset by 2050, incest lessons to be compulsory as part of the national curriculum, and work-houses to replace social housing. He also wanted public execution to be brought back for being poor, but stopped short at the return of slavery, although those views may change after Brexit.
A Labour spokesperson today ridiculed the MP with this Facebook post:
“In the Year of Darkness, 2017, the rulers of this Government devised the ultimate plan. They would reshape the future by bringing back the horrors of the Past. The plan required something that felt no pity. No pain. No fear. Something unstoppable. They created ‘THE MOGGINATOR’
The thing that won’t die, in the nightmare that won’t end.
Your future could be in his hands.”
