Serial metaphorical and actual seat avoider, and leader of a thousand students ineligible to vote, Jeremy Corbyn, has announced that nothing will stop him ruining the Labour party.
In a vibrant PMQ’s before the dissolution of Parliament, Theresa May thrust a sword down on Mr. Corbyn’s shoulder, and as his arm fell to the floor he shouted;
“Tis but a scratch.”
Fast forward to less than one month before the General Election, and Labour are looking about as strong as a malnourished Jacob Reese-Mogg.
This hasn’t hindered the beleaguered Werther’s addict however, who in an effort to appeal to the cool kids gave the following statement to ‘an interweb residence on the electronic information super highway.’
“‘I’m serious about winning the election. I’m serious about going out there, I’ve been in Worcester and Leamington, I’ve been in Warrington, I’ve been in Croydon but I won’t go to Rochdale. I have a mandate and I’ll lead this party forever, even after I die.”
