In an attempt to appear more human Theresa May took a break from eating her usual diet of live mice and had one of her aides purchase a cone of chips from a local cafe.
The PM was heard saying “What is it Rupert? A slice of potato fried in oil? How quaint.”
She then took one and very cautiously took a small bite.
After approximately three seconds of slow chewing, the PM’s face contorted and wide eyed, she signalled her aide, who obligingly cupped his hands as the PM spat out the mushed potato.
“They aren’t as crunchy as a nightvwriggly white mouse and you can barely taste the squeak. Humans are disgusting. Take me home so someone can brush my teeth.”
