The government has been accused of the suppression of voters’ rights after plans to introduce compulsory checks of a family coat of arms for voters were leaked.

Reports that the Queen’s speech contains proposals to making the showing of a heraldic design on an escutcheon such as a surcoat or a tabard at the ballot box a requirement have been met with¬†anger by landowners and noblemen who say the move may lead to democratic participation.

Some within government aren’t sure that the plan goes far enough and are pushing for tighter election controls including the presentation of a photo id, land titles and an Eton Old Boys’ school tie.

“The idea that any minor aristocrat could show up at the ballot box and expect a say in the future of our country is completely preposterous.” A junior minister told the Rochdale Herald.

“We really ought to be limiting the vote to people who were clever enough to be born the first son of a land baron or the great great great great great grandson of a moderately successful pirate.”

“If we’re not careful these plans could lead to a peasant revolt or women getting the vote.”

Quentin D Fortesqueue is a founding editor of The Rochdale Herald. Part time amateur narcissist and full time satirist Quentin is never happier than when playing his lute and drinking a full bodied Bordeaux. He rarely plays the lute and never gets to drink Bordeaux.