A genocidal bastard from Lancashire has demanded that he has his tummy tickled this morning.

The mass murderer called Mr Wiggles made the request this morning after spending the night murdering babies and dismembering their parents.

Authorities told The Rochdale Herald “I’m not sure this psycho deserves to have his tummy tickled after what he’s done.”

“But he’s just so cute, how can I say no to that face.”