It has been revealed that a Rochdale man was forced to exchange his first-born child for a pint during a recent visit to London.
Harry Anderson, a salesman by trade, was in London on business when he ordered a pint of Doom Bar from St Stephen’s Tavern in Fulham. However when he tried to pay for the drink he realised that, short of remortgaging his house and carrying out a couple of armed robberies, he was unable to do so.
Fortunately the landlord was sympathetic to his plight and agreed to accept Harry’s seven year old son, Toby, in exchange for the pint.
Speaking to The Rochdale Herald Anderson admitted that “I knew London was expensive, but I didn’t realise it was that expensive”.
He expressed gratitude to the landlord for his “very kind and reasonable proposal” admitting that he initially assumed he would insist on “at least one of my limbs as well”. Instead the deal both “got me my pint” and “removed the inevitable disappointment of watching my son grow up and fail to become a doctor”.
Anderson also faces legal action after he attempted to engage in small talk with a Londoner at King’s Cross Station. In response Anderson is being charged with aggravated harassment, and banned from going within 500 metres of any mainline London station as an intermediary measure.
Asked to comment on the case London Mayor Sadiq Khan replied “hanging’s too good for that bastard” before being led away be an aide as he started foaming at the mouth.