Prime minister Theresa May has won the 2017 Parliamentary Cross Party Hide and Seek Trophy ahead of stiff competition.
“It was an incredible effort from the Prime Minister, a truly stellar performance.” Said Lord Poncenby, who chairs the award committee.
“Last year it was a tie between Boris Johnson, Michael Gove and Jeremy Corbyn. They all scarpered after the Brexit referendum. It took David Cameron resigning before they came out of hiding.”
“Daine Abbott was considered as a contender, but was disqualified as she wasn’t hiding. John McDonnell had locked her in a wardrobe to stop her from appearing on Woman’s Hour.
This year Mrs May is a very deserving winner and one the most successful candidates we’ve seen in a long time. She has spent six weeks in hiding from Jeremy Corbyn and the electorate during the General Election campaign.
But what has really topped it is her ability to hide not only from the residents of Grenfell Tower but from her own reflection in the mirror.”
The award, which is an eight foot tall golden trophy, detailing an osterich with its head in the sand, is given to the politician who ‘has shown remarkable tenacity in the face of public scrutiny and perfected the art of evasion, subterfuge and comouflage.’
Theresa May is yet to comment on the honour. A Downing Street spokesman gave us the following statement.
“We imagine the Prime Minister will be thrilled to receive this award, but no one has been able to find her to tell her about. A specialist team of sniffer dogs has been called to do a profound search of Downing Street to locate and present her with the trophy.”
