Theresa May has taken the unusual decision to demand a trial by combat rather than face the EU over the table at trade negotiations.
She reportedly told a press conference in Italy yesterday that:
“I am innocent, but I will get no justice here. You leave me no choice but to appeal to the gods. I demand trial by battle.”
The move has been heralded as a smart move by UK Brexit negotiators who have been charged with making impossibly ludicrous demands in negotiations in which we hold none of the ace cards.
The new format of the negotiations will involve Theresa May fighting a nominated representative of each of the 28 EU member states to the death in front of EU MEP’s.
“To be fair she has a better chance of securing a deal this way than we would have at the negotiating table, at least this way she has a 28 to 1 chance of survival as opposed to no chance whatsoever. Provided of course that she doesn’t have to fight them all at once.”
The EU have not yet stipulated whether on not they will allow Theresa to fight each member state one at a time.
Why would they?
